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Trevor Murray on Brotherhood, Combat, Mental Health, and Finding Purpose After Service | Security Halt! Podcast Ep. 445

Deny Caballero Season 8 Episode 445

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How do you carry the weight of combat, loss, and sacrifice while building a meaningful life after military service?

In Episode 445 of the Security Halt! Podcast, Deny Caballero sits down with former Green Beret Trevor Murray for an honest conversation about brotherhood, combat, resilience, mental health, and the lifelong pursuit of healing.

Trevor reflects on his journey from growing up in Texas to serving in the U.S. Army Special Forces, sharing lessons learned from high-tempo combat deployments, the emotional toll of losing teammates, and the responsibility every Green Beret carries to honor those who came before them. Together, Deny and Trevor explore what it means to "suffer well," embrace vulnerability, and find purpose beyond the military.

This episode is a powerful conversation for veterans, first responders, and anyone navigating adversity while searching for hope, faith, and connection.

 

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Chapters:

00:00 Introduction and Accomplishments

00:57 Trevor's Early Life and Influences

02:48 Military Journey and Becoming a Green Beret

06:04 Combat Experiences and Lessons Learned

14:03 The Impact of Loss and Suffering

19:54 Transitioning from Military to Civilian Life

25:00 Mental Health and Healing in the Veteran Community

30:55 The Importance of Vulnerability and Brotherhood

40:05 Transitioning from Military to Civilian Life

43:46 The Importance of Education and Self-Belief

50:49 Honoring a Fallen Comrade: The Incline Challenge

01:01:52 Building Brotherhood and Community Support

01:12:15 Faith and Resources for Veterans
 
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Identity Conflict and Wake Up Call

SPEAKER_01

I can be a good Green Beret and a good husband. It's 100% true, but it's very rare. Um, I never saw myself being that husband, but I became that husband. It was like I replaced wanting to be a good husband and father with just being a good Green Beret, right? As long as I can do that, that's good enough. And then life hits you in the face, like square in the face. You get more comfortable being in combat with bullets flying, and you do a kid screaming at home because your endocrine dysfunction's off the charts. Your fight or flight mechanism is jacked to hell. Like you feel like you're only meant for one thing. You're a very specific, you know, multi-tool for this job. I can't pinpoint a specific moment, but I know that the facade kind of started to fall away of like, hey, at some point this is gonna end, and what am I gonna have left? Because my wife and I's relationship is on the rocks, my kids barely know me.

SPEAKER_00

Trevor Murray, welcome to Security Hub Podcast, brother. How are you today? I'm good, my brother. How are you? Doing well, man. Um, I am surprised you're up and walking after accomplishing a Herculean task over this past weekend.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, it's it's uh I think it's helpful to have the the kiddos running around at such young ages too, right? It's like they uh they appreciate that dad did something hard, but at the same time, it's like there's no excuse. We we need to keep rocking and rolling. We got we got games to play, so they've been helpful in that.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, that's exactly it. I don't care what you just got done doing, brother. Yeah, it's time to go. Okay, Dan.

SPEAKER_01

You walked up a big set of stairs, great. That's awesome. We we got games to play.

SPEAKER_00

Uh The Kind on the Incline 2026. It's in the books, it's in the bag, it's done. And uh we're gonna get into that. We're gonna dive into this journey of suffering and and remembrance and honor. Uh, but man, you've got a story to tell, and I am so glad to have you here, brother, because uh I want to dive into everything before we get into this the great suffering uh in in in honor of a great man and a great foundation. I want to figure out and and I want the audience to learn about you, man. So take it all the way back to the beginning.

Texas Roots and Servant Leadership

SPEAKER_00

Tell us about Trevor.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, man. So uh, you know, I was born and raised in the great state of Texas, the Lone Star State. I was raised in a family of uh coaches and teachers, um, which I always kind of add that to my testimony because I think that that played a huge and pivotal role in who I became, um, why I pursued being a Green Beret, right? That servant leader mentality was something that was introduced to me at a very young age, especially with my grandfather, my father. Um, so I grew up in team sports and competitive sports. Um, it was something that was very important to me. Played football, power lifted, um, did all the things. Went to school, um, Tex AM fighting Texas Aggies. Oh, no shit. Yeah, yeah. So I was already indoctrinated into the whole like uh, you know, if it happens twice, it's a you know, it's a tradition kind of thing. So it worked well for uh not only being a GB but then coming into the Catholic Church. So, anyways, it's just a Catholic joke there. But um we yeah, so I I I grew up there, I went to school at AM, got a business degree, um, and then moved to Austin um after college. I actually was really influenced by a lot of um a lot of guys from Texas that were not only military but special operations. It's something that was always very intriguing to me. Uh, but I didn't know what I wanted to do. Originally thought I wanted to be a SEAL. Um, you know, I pursued that route. Um, actually got a contract, didn't end up working out for me by the grace of God. He, you know, the Lord knew the plan that he had for me. Um stayed in Austin for a couple of years, trained at a gym that was very like military athlete-centric called Atomic Athlete. Um, that community really helped mold me in the sense of like, hey, this is something that you um, you know, what was told to me by a lot of these guys that have been outside the wire that were either current or former special operators was like, hey man, even if you go and you don't make it, at least you won't be the guy at the bar that's like, I was gonna, but then I didn't. That's the last thing you want to have, right? It's like, don't, don't sell yourself short and not taking that opportunity.

18X Pipeline and Becoming an 18D

SPEAKER_01

So went to college, got my degree, um, and then decided to pursue the military. So a little later in the game, um, went the 18 X-ray route into the army. Uh, for those familiar with that, you know, pipeline, kind of civilian to special operations. My brother actually had gone a year ahead of me and a couple other buddies had gone through the pipeline from the gym as well. So I was relatively familiar with the SF mission. But, you know, I'd been so inundated with wanting to go to the Navy route, I had to really learn the side of unconventional warfare and what that actually meant. And like I said, it was, you know, it was divine providence because I was meant to be a Green Beret. I'm fully convicted and convinced of that. Uh, you know, the opportunity to come and serve with the regiment that we both served for and be an 18 Delta and to do what I did was it was the greatest honor of my life, right? So went to the queue, um, went the Delta route. So got to play the, you know, got to play doctor on TV, went to Sokum, uh, went through the you know, the trials and tribulations of of the long long course. Felt like it never ended. I think I was like almost three years to the day that I was in the queue. I had one recycle. Um so graduated, went to 10th group, and I always tell people that I the blessing and a curse, right? I I feel like I did my career backwards because everybody, you know, guys call it different things, right? Like wanting to touch the fire, chase the dragon, everybody looks for that one, that one deployment or that one mission, that that thing that you everybody thinks they want a part of the high-speed mission. I got that right out the kick. Um, the team was it was a team of just meat eaters, like absolute killers, pillar mentality. Um, the mission that we got because of those guys was incredible.

Afghanistan Combat and Medic Reality

SPEAKER_01

We were the half team in Afghanistan out of Camp Dolkey. Um, and we absolutely got after it in 2019. Um that being said, we we got after it, but we also got exposed to some pretty high-profile missions. One in particular, I know you had you know uh Colin Lightfoot on recently on the podcast. Colin spoke to one of our missions in particular. We had a a pretty precarious um situation of going into like an ISIS hotbed out in eastern Afghanistan. Thought we had a good expectation of what we were getting into, and really it was like kicking the hornet's nest. I mean, we absolutely just got we we we we underestimated the the extent and of the fighting force that we were coming up against. We ended up running into a like a 35 patient mascal um when that houseborn IED went off, which is where Colin was injured um and several of our other guys. So, you know, I'm I'm brand new junior 18 Delta on an ODA. Really the first time I've ever had a casualty experience, except for some small things in missions leading up to that. And here you are. It's like I talked to one of my my R18 Fox that came in after that, after that mission, was actually one of my uh instructors in the course, Fanalo dude, friend for life. I was like, dude, where where was that lesson in soccer, man? Like nobody told me that was that wasn't in the brochure. That was nuts, you know.

SPEAKER_00

Um they can't they can't teach you and prepare you for everything, you know? That's why they so critically.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, a hundred percent, right? It's like and obviously that's a joke. It's like it's it's uh it's our coping mechanisms, right? That dark sense of humor like, yo, dude, nobody told me that uh, you know, like you I explained it to somebody recently. It's like trying to trying to articulate what it's like for us. You know, we we've we've done a really good job of putting uh terms and conditions to operator syndrome and things that we we don't necessarily quantify as PTS in our world in particular, because guys are so good at operating under high stress environments, operating in um precarious situations, being the coolest head in the room, uh, but getting to a place where you're almost like in your that endocrine, you can you can almost go back and remember when the endocrine endocrine dysfunction started, right? Of like the adrenaline kick, the adrenaline dump, the adrenaline kick, the adrenaline dump. You just watch your buddy do something incredibly heroic and then something the most terrifying thing you've ever experienced, and four times that happens in a 10-minute span. Yeah. Um, you know, that's kind of a little window of like what combat can be like when you know it's not all the sexy stuff that everybody wants to talk about. It it there are things that you get to experience that are truly heroic, right? You get to you get to see giants of men do incredible things, and it's a testament to why you go to these units, but there's also things that nobody tells you about, right? There's not there's things that nobody really prepares you for, and and I don't know that they rightfully could either, that the mental toll, what you're gonna go through, being a medic, especially and having to bring guys out of that, you yourself not knowing what you went through and having to like take care of your guys. So that was a catalyst, that was a cat, like a catalytic change, catalyst shift for me in my career because it happened so early. And to have that happen, where you know, you're you're kind of trying to piece it all together, but also say, like, okay, what's the next thing? And the next thing never seems like it's even going to remotely touch what you experience. So I say that, you know, I had phenomenal experiences throughout my career. You know, I was on a dive team, um, stellar group of dudes. I got back from Afghanistan, went straight to dive school.

Dive Team Culture and Earning Respect

SPEAKER_00

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SPEAKER_01

You know, you've been around enough divers, right? It's like it's it's the most beautifully ruthless experience you could ever imagine. Like, I, you know, these guys I just went to war with and like went to hell and back with, and they're like, hey, we love you, and we would go to war with you any day, but until you have a bubble, like you're not a part of this team. And it's like, dude, just cut to the core, man.

SPEAKER_00

Oh, I know. I am, I am, I am well aware. I always like to say that it's like when you're non, especially like like there was a long lineage of non-dive qualified warrants on 3-5. It was it was just hilarious. When I walked in, I saw him like, oh, that was my old 18 Fox. He's not a dive qualified warrant. Oh, that that was a company warrant I had. He's not. It was like, it's like they're like something about the dynamic. We're just gonna constantly do this. And it was, it wasn't until uh my friend uh ended up being the warrant that replaced me on that team that that team had a dive qualified warrant. It was like the first one in like 10 fucking years. But it's true, man. Like it even even if the majority of the guys on the team aren't dive qualified, like it's still a thing. But I will tell you this, I don't care what anybody says. There is something about dive teams, the culture is so much different, and I'm better for having served on that team. Like how I it it it to this day, like I was just a soft week and had a chance to reconnect with my old battalion warrant that ultimately made that decision for me. And I was like, dude, you you had left and we started preparing for Afghanistan. I never got a chance to thank you for what you did for me in my career. You gave me the the opportunity to be on the greatest team I've ever served on. And that's no shade to my my previous ODA. That's no shade to like, look, free fall, free fall for life, dog. Meet missile, flying in the sky. Nothing beats that. Um, but I will tell you, I will tell you right now, everybody on that last team I served with, absolute fucking killers. Every last one of them, every fucking last one of them, non-divers too, because it was, dude, you the the culture permeates and it changes. It was it was different, man. It was absolutely fucking different. And I I noticed it the moment I walked in there. Uh, it was just the greatest fucking team. And everybody's like, get off the dive guy's nuts. I'm like, no, it it's you can find great teams everywhere. So in in some in some units, in some groups, maybe it's the fucking mountain team. Maybe, maybe it is the free fall team. But I will tell you from my experience, 3-5, man, that team, and I guarantee it's still the same. And it wasn't because I was a great leader or that anybody, it it lives, it permeates off the walls, the lineage stays there. The you chase different things when it's like, like I don't know. I I think there's that little bit of mysticism, uh mystique. I think there's something about it, man, it's just different, it stays there. Um that team, you hit the nail on the head, right?

SPEAKER_01

It's like outside looking in, it's hard to understand. Inside looking out, it's hard, you can't describe it to somebody, right? And it's not a knock on any other team. There's obviously like my brother was on a free fall team in fifth group. Um, absolute savages. Those guys are incredible. Mountain teams, all these guys are awesome. Obviously, my bias, my experience was on the dive team, but what I can say is that like being a non-diver and then going right into combat and and working with other teams, there is just something different, right? And I think that it's A, what you keyed on, right? Is like there's a lineage and there's an expectation that you're not that you're never good enough, but it's always like there's a humility on a dive team, like, hey, till you get your bubble, till you get soup, till you go, you got senior U7s going to Ranger School, right? I think it was call and Lightfoot told me, I think early on, you know, talking about Sergeant Major Soder and the legacy of divers, especially at 10th group, was like, um, hey, man, you just so you know, like, you're not earning this bubble for you, right? You're earning it for the guy that came before you, that set the standard for you, just like he earned it for somebody else, right? It's that legacy mentality on a dive team where it's like, you don't even earn this bubble. You don't own this bubble. You're oh you're earning it for the guys that came before you that built the legacy for you. And some guy should, you know, God willing, comes along and earns it for you because you train them to be a diver, right? That diver mentality. But dude, in combat, right, and that's my experience, but like these guys were cool as a fucking cucumber, right? Like, you know, you couldn't rattle the guys. You just couldn't rattle the guys, and they were, they were calculated, they were killers, they were just it's a different mentality, man. It's hard to explain to somebody, you know, until you've been basically jujitsued underwater and taken air taken away. It's like, okay, yeah, then maybe that makes sense. Maybe that makes sense like why you're so woo-saw in chaos, because you had to be just for a just for a badge to be on your team. Checks out.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, man. It's so true. I think that um and again, it keys off into everything that you're doing now. There's a life free of suffering, and and it also goes into our our you know, our faith, our Catholic faith, man. Uh a life free of suffering is no life at all. Like life is there is a certain element of it where there is suffering. And and that that phrase, suffer well. Um are you the are you gonna be the guy that takes it out on people? Are you gonna be the guy that can't, you know, when everything's against them, when everything's going up against you, are you gonna be the guy that crumbles or the guy that prays for strength and and thanks God for the strength to bear it well? Um Yeah, I think that there's there's a lot, there's a lot for us to unpack there. But you know, you mentioned something about having done your career backwards. And I want to dive into that a little bit. Like you have this great experience in combat that a lot of a lot of men in our regiment, especially in our time, in the the later time frame, like the 2018, 2019, 2020, a lot of guys are looking or coming into the Q course or coming out of the Q course and they're like, I want to get that combat deployment. What was it like getting that immediately coming back and being like, all right, let's get some more reps, and then seeing that that door close.

SPEAKER_01

It was it was equally as validating as it was um shocking, is is probably, I mean, just for for lack of a better term, because you know, I'm watching my buddies go on other rotations equally as important, if not more important, right, for operations capabilities to Eastern Europe and what they were doing over there. But of course, everybody wants to get that combat rip, right? And nobody, nobody wants to sit with like, you know, I didn't get to test my metal, right? Like we all know what that feels like to come out of the queue and be like, hey, what am I gonna do when bullets start flying? Right? How am I gonna react? Who am I gonna be? What type of man am I gonna be in combat, right? It speaks to a lot of the things that brought us to that community in particular. Now we all see it because we're all going through our healing journey and realizing, you know, the wounds that you have that you carry into service time that make you want to be a green beret, right? Like that push you to be that elite performing individual, you also are chasing that like that high of adrenaline in the sense of like, how far how far can I push this, right? And how will I how will I respond when bullets start flying? Um, can I compartmentalize? And there is a level of like there's a level of validation in that, but there's also a level of like what you get exposed to. And then when you see the after effects, in particular to when you see your buddies and the effects that that not only a single, you know, because I I was a one pump chump to combat, right? Like I got my rip, and then it was like, I mean, don't get me wrong, it was hellacious. There was it was chaos, right? It was everything I wanted more in the sense, um, packed into six months. But the reality is, like, I had multiple guys on my team that had rotations as Iraq, Africa, Afghanistan, Eastern Europe, multiple, multiple rotations. And you, and then a a rip like that in combat where it's like, you know, the enemy knew we were on our way out, we knew, they knew, and it was like a gentleman's accord, like, let's fucking bang, dude. And we did. We did. It was just like, let's go. Like every mission we're going out the kick, and when it's just like, dude, all right. Even the ones where we're like, oh, it's a it's a pod, you know, for people who know period of darkness, like it's an in and out half-raid. Like, it's not gonna, they don't like to fight at night, and all of a sudden you're like, what is going on, dude? Like, let's rumble, baby.

SPEAKER_00

You know, and Terry Dice called dog. This motherfucker's on fire.

SPEAKER_01

Let's control, man. And you just like, thank God, I'm on a team of killers because these guys just like roll with the punches, man. And you grow up fast, right? You have to grow up fast, but it's the stuff that nobody tells you about, right? Like we that was a really rough deployment. Um, we lost, you know, Masson Will Lindsay, or I'm sorry, uh, first class Will Lindsey, I think he was posthumously promoted, um, Mike Riley, um, and then Sergeant Major Sarter, and then we lost EOD tech and support personnel with them. So we lost a lot of Americans, a lot of good men and partner force on that trip because it was highly kinetic. But it was the men that we lost and the impact it had on my seniors, right? Because, you know, the one that stands out to me, you know, and obviously a lot of people know, especially connected to the Special Forces Foundation, is Sergeant Major Ryan Sarter, you know, who how not very rarely do you see a Sergeant Major killed in, killed in action, you know, on in a combat rip because they're not typically at that stage, they're not putting themselves in positions where they're going out the door constantly. Sergeant Major Sarder, he was the exact opposite, right? He's like the Green Beret is Green Beret, right? That's the quote that you see float around about Sergeant Major Starter is that grown men look up to Green Berets, Green Berets looked up to Ryan Starter. And that couldn't have been more than more true, right? Like Sergeant Major Starter, Texas boy. Um, he's the guy that you hear about when you get to 10th group, just a legend. My mentors, the guys that I'm like awe-inspired by, my seniors on my team, they look at him that way. Like I'll never forget my seniors. You know, they're they're getting me ready for combat. They they let you know, they invited me out, they let me too. You know, you know what I'm talking about. They let me come out to the bar with them one night before not by their dude, you know, like it was a big deal. I I went out to one of the breweries in town before Afghanistan, and Sergeant Major Sarders there with his wife and a couple other guys from 10th group, and it you could just feel it in the air, like it was their ritual for like getting ready for combat. But the way that my seniors looked at him, it it just it's hard to put into words what what he meant until you experience a man like that, right? When we say giants of men, that's who we talk about, is like a man that that he personifies what a Green Beret is. So when I think about Sergeant Major Sarter, Mikey Riley, who he who he was to all the guys, Will Lindsay, like it wasn't not not that any loss is ever good, but it's the guys that you lose. It's like these legends, these so much experience, so much life, so much, you know, they they they have so many connections to the regiment. And I can vividly remember sitting in the talk, sitting in our uh battle officer, is like listening to the nine lines come up and miss reports come in, like sitting there as the medic and getting those calls. That's the stuff that sticks with you, right? Is like Oh yeah. Dude. Going out the door for a writ, you've been preparing for that, right? There's a there's a compartmentalization, a muscle memory. Like you go and do your PCCs, PCIs, you're doing your checks. Like, hell yeah, I'm going out with my boys. I'm getting on a helicopter. What happens, happens. Like I've I've checked all the boxes. Like my wife will be good, my kids will be good, right? All the stuff we convince ourselves of. But it's when you're sitting there and there's a it's the uncontrollable element of like, I'm watching my senior pace back and forth, right? Because he's waiting to hear if it's his buddy, his battle roster number, the uh, you know, the eagle that got hit. It's like that stuff that sticks with you that nobody, and it would be very difficult to train somebody on. So saying all that, right? It was a very kinetic trip. Come home from that, and I did not do a good job of coping with that, right?

SPEAKER_00

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SPEAKER_01

Cool. I'm gonna bury all that date. I'm gonna go get drowned in the pool so I can be even more a part of my team because all I want to do is be accepted by these guys, right? Now, all I just like I'm so enamored by having been to hell and back, like to the edge of death and back with these guys. Now I will do anything to be a part of this fraternity, this community. I'm gonna go to dive school, went to dive, got my bubble, um, came back. And then it was just like, it felt like it just, you know, it just never stopped, right? It's just KDY rotation. We did a rotation to Eastern Europe. Um, that one was equally as stressful, just in different ways, because of everything that was leading up and to it was in 2021. Um, so different preparation, different mission, but you know as well as anybody, right? Our unit in particular, we're never not busy, right? We're just constantly gone.

Endocrine Dysfunction and Family Breakdown

SPEAKER_01

We're constantly rotating. It's the stress and strain that it puts on the family. You know, the old adage of like, I can be a good Green Beret and a good husband, it's 100% true, but it's very rare because it's so much more enticing to be the guy that's like, you know, cracking beers in the team room at midnight when you get back from the range. Um, you, you know, it sounds like a trope, but it's like you get more comfortable being in combat with bullets flying than you do a kid screaming at home because your endocrine dysfunction's off the charts, your your uh fight or flight mechanism is jacked to hell. Like you just you you have dysregulated so hard, you're all you feel like you're only meant for one thing. You're a very specific multi- you know, multi-tool for this job. So it, you know, all of that kind of played into my decisions. I had become very jaded towards the tail end of my career. I didn't do a full 20, right? When I when I showed up to 10th group, you could not have convinced me I wasn't gonna do a full 20. Um, and then life happened, right? I had a kid. I missed my kid's first birthday by a week going to Afghanistan, came back at 18 months, and then I'm out the door again. Uh second kid's born like two years after that, and it's just like I don't, I don't know him, right? And uh my wife and I went through the same struggles that many, many couples do in that community. Um, I never saw myself being that husband, but I became that husband. It was like I replaced wanting to be a good husband and a father with just being a good Green Beret, right? As long as I can do that, that's good enough. And then life hits you in the face, like square in the face. And it's, you know, I don't, I can't pinpoint a specific moment, but I know that the facade kind of started to fall away of like, hey, at some point this is gonna end. And what am I gonna have left? Because my wife and I's relationship is on the rocks, my kids barely know me. Um, I'm struggling, and I'm not gonna get the help I need until I slow down, like all the way down. And I was so stuck in medic mode of taking care of other guys, it was like I was just pushing all my stuff to the side. So made the decision to step away from team life um at about the eight, nine-year mark. Um, I did one year with uh 19th group up at the SWID, which was great. Those guys were awesome, but fully transitioned out in 2023 and um went into construction of all things. So I was an 18 Delta. Yeah, I was an 18 Delta in uh, you know, my entire career, did medicine, like crazy levels of, you know, like a lot of combat medicine, like all this stuff, loved medicine. And I think it was along those same lines. It was just like, hey man, um don't make the same mistake. Don't uh let what you do define who you are, right? Don't let what you do as a career define who you are as a person. So I wanted a clean slate. So I had worked in construction before the military, thought, hey, let me give this a crack. Went into working as a project manager and high-end costume home builds. But I tell people a lot, I feel like I did, I was more involved and did more medicine in the in the two to three years after service time than I did in the three years leading up to getting out because it was right around that time that I'm doing I'm going through my own healing and I'm watching a lot of my buddies go through the same things, whether they were hitting their full 20 and retiring or just struggling.

Trauma After War and Suicide Risk

SPEAKER_01

And it you know, it's the catalytic event of like, you know, wars, war um ends in Afghanistan, the way the pullout happened. I think we all know that that had a a dramatically, you know, traumatic effect on a lot of guys seeing the way that that transpired, that was kind of like, you know, a an inflection point for a lot of guys for the trauma to start bubbling up. And after that, it was just like seeing ramp up on mental health issues and suicides. And now we're just losing guys. Like it felt like every week we were losing somebody, man. And it hits you, right? Especially when it's somebody from the reds, like 10th group, or you you know a guy who knows a guy. But then when we lost Nick in the summer of 2022, it it just it just rocked me, man. It shifted my whole perspective because you hear it all the time, but truly, he was the last person you could have not have convinced me that I would ever be having that conversation about so first class Nick was guard. There was just no way.

SPEAKER_00

Um I think it always hits people the hardest when it's somebody when you can visually see the suffering, it makes it a lot easier for people. When you can visually see somebody that's struggling, whether it's an addiction or an ailment, it makes it like, oh yeah, dude. Of course, of course, he was going through so much. But the problem with our demographic and in the veteran space, we wear a mask really well. And it's it's it people are taken aback all the friggin' time. It would never guess in a million years it'd be Jimmy or Steve. And it's like, yeah, man, you can't expect what you don't inspect. If you're not plugged into your brothers, I am telling you, the guys with the biggest smile, the guys that are always there cheering you on and are always checking in on you, those guys also need to get checked in on because we wear it well.

SPEAKER_01

100%, man. And and we talk about it too, especially on the medic side, right? It's very similar, is like medics are the worst patients, right? Because number one, you know how to kind of mask symptoms and you know how to compartmentalize because you have to being a medic. You have to be able to shut your brain off to this is my buddy I'm working on. So you can also apply that to I don't need help right now, right? Like I'll get it when I when I have time, but I got to help the body, the boys. I was telling somebody this this weekend, too, is like, you know, and it's the old trip, like back in the day, it was like we can speak openly to it because we're having this conversation more now, right? It was seen as a weakness, right? Like, oh, that he was just having a weak moment, he was weak. Well, no shit, we don't talk about our issues because number one, I don't want to lose team time. I don't be pulled off the the rotation uh off an ODA. Number two, I don't want to be seen as weak. I spent all this time training, uh performing to standard to be a green beret. I don't want that all to be taken away from me. Um, and I think it's something that lends to it is that like a lot of us don't realize how much we carried into the regiment, right? Like we're now all going through these healing processes to understand that many of us have childhood wounds or we have things that we just did not know were even there that that pushed us towards even being a green bread in the first place. And so when you have that underlying layer of trauma and then you exacerbate it with combat or exacerbate it with just this lifestyle and general general of service, it's a it's a powder keg waiting to explode. And then you send that guy out into the world and you're like, all right, good luck, man. And you know, we for years there just wasn't enough certain, there weren't there weren't systems in place to help. Um, we now, we know that that's changed. Now the biggest thing is having the conversations with guys to say, hey, you know, uh, first of all, get your shit together and stop being an asshole. Humble yourself, right? The vulnerability doesn't make you weak. It makes you a fucking G. It makes you a man, excuse my language. Um, but you know, this makes you, this really speaks to who you are as a man. Can you Roger up and speak to these things? Can you actually step up to the plate and go get the healing that you need for yourself, for your wife, for your kids, for your family, for your brothers, right? Because if you truly mean what you say when you say, hey, the brotherhood means so much to me, then you better damn well be here for your brotherhood, right? You you have to be here for the brothers because there is a there's a good, good chance that after you get that healing, it's the pay it forward dividend, right? It always happens where like you get the healing and all of a sudden the door opens where a guy's like, man, I'm really struggling, and all of a sudden we know it's the Holy Spirit, right? That all of a sudden you're like, whoa, I I experienced that same thing. Let me just speak to this to this guy, and maybe he'll resonate with it because I because he knows who I am, and it's not just some random therapist that's telling him. We owe that to our brothers, right? We owe that to them at the very least to have those conversations and to get them connected with the organizations that are out there. Because there's a many, many organizations out there. Um, Special Forces Foundation is a great example of that, that want to help. They want so badly to help our community, but the guys have to get connected with that help and they have to want the help because it doesn't do you any good if you just if you're being pushed into this stuff. You gotta be, you gotta be primed for healing for it to actually take effect.

SPEAKER_00

That's that's the biggest thing that I struggle with because you you know it, people will reach out. When you get to a better place, when you're doing better, people immediately reach out and they want to refer people to you. And the number one thing I always tell guys is okay, cool. Is that person ready for help? Yeah. Are they actively going to receive this well, or are they gonna call me a piece of shit and tell me to go fuck off? Because until that person is ready or at least willing to have a conversation, it's not gonna happen. No, I can't force somebody to give up alcohol. I can't force somebody to go to a treatment center. We all have to come to that. And and it being, you know, I've shared this before, you know, they I went through years of lying to Michelle every single day, every time I went to see her, until I absolutely got to the point where I was gonna do something stupid. And then I I verbally acknowledged that I was suffering, that I was struggling, and I was gonna do something stupid. And then the resources opened up. And it's such a funny thing, now I look back, it's such a funny thing. I'm I'm actively suffering. I'm in a place of friggin' deep despair, and I'm wrangling with things that I know human beings should be dealing with. And here's a resource that I'm I'm not even aware of because I'm not even willing to just be honest. Stories shape culture, they build trust, and when they're told the right way, they move people to action. That's what we do at Security Hall Media. We don't just produce content, we create authentic, impactful, and purpose-driven storytelling for podcasters, nonprofits, brands, and leaders who are on a mission. For people who've lived real experiences and want their message to actually matter, from podcast production and video to strategic storytelling and distribution. We hope you clarify your voice, elevate your brand, and connect with the audience you're trying to serve. If you have a story worth telling and a purpose behind it, Security Hall Media is here to help you tell it the right way. Click the link in the episode description to learn more today. And that's and it's when you put it in the simplistic terms, it is funny. I laugh about it now. I look at like all this suffering and it's like, hey, man, it would have been a lot easier if you just opened up and told the truth to somebody.

SPEAKER_01

You're laughing about it because it's it it makes sense, but at the same time, it's like, yeah, come on, dude. Like we're, you know, it the green brain mentality in this is like weapons loadout, weapon system loadout for any mission, like would never not do our checks and balances, PCCs, PCIs. Like, what do I actually need for this particular mission, right? Bravo side, delta side. But we won't do it for our healing. We won't actually do a comprehensive assessment of like, oh, this is what I'm struggling with. And so maybe I should go, I should go treat it that particular thing and treat it like a mission loadout, right? I treat it like, hey, let me just pick this apart and not do the, you know, I describe it as the pendulum swing, right? It's like we're all we're nothing done in moderation, as the SEALs say, right? Like I'm either all in and burying it all deep, or I'm gonna go all over to the, I guess it's I guess I just have to be a broken veteran and play the woe is me game. Like, no, dude, there's a middle ground, right? Like there's a fucking, there's a there's a middle ground. And I I say that from a place of like it's not a judgment. That's exactly where I was at, right? I was like, oh, I guess now it's time for me to be like to go through my you know CMP exam and do all these things and bitch about the VA and do all these things. It's like, no, dude, like it, if I really think about it, the human beings I interact with at the VA on an individual level are good people. They they want to help, right? It may not always be that the system is is capable of functioning at the highest degree, but it's because they're they're serving huge population, right? It's it's perspective shift on this stuff. And and at the same time, like I have to, we go back to it, we have to want that help. So of course it's not gonna work. Of course the system's not gonna work if I'm just like fighting it tooth and nail and then going, well, it's just not working for me, man. It's just they're just you know, the system sucks. Like, nah, dude, you're just like literally stepping on your own crank, brother. Um, and then, you know, they're not even helping me, even though I'm not gonna be able to do it. Yeah, it's like, hey, dude, uh that's that may be true. Do you know there's probably a hundred organizations out there that will pay for your uh, you know, stellate ganglion block, will pay for these treatments, will get you to these nonprofits that will do incredible treatments, but you gotta want it, right? And you gotta humble yourselves and be vulnerable to that help, right? You gotta be willing to ask for it because that's a big part of the step of a lot of these treatment programs is that you as the individual, as the patient, have to initiate that. It's not like a, you know, it's not something that somebody can force you into. You gotta, you gotta roger up to it, right? And that's where we say, how do we have that conversation with our brothers where we say, I to me, Denny, it's like it's guys like you, it's guys like Colin, it's guys like um, you know, Tom Satterley of All Sevier Foundation, who, you know, I uh the first year we did DeCine, we did the donations to All Secure because uh Emily, my wife and I had just gone through a camp home front. We were going through the therapy with with their therapist, their their couples therapy, right? Then they're one of the only organizations out there that does the soft specific couples treatment because they saw a need for it, because they had both been through it together. So it's we we started saying after that, nobody takes care of us better than our own, right? And that speaks to what I guess I'm alluding to is that the courage that we had to be to go out and like take the fights the enemy. The enemy now is keeping our brothers in the fight. And it's gonna take those leaders to step up and to have the vulnerable conversations, right? Like, like you do on a weekly basis on the podcast, like Colin did for me and for our teammates, where it's like, hey, that that level of the threshold of violence, if you will, of vulnerability, of like, man, it's really uncomfortable for me to have this open conversation about the things I've experienced or what I've been through in life. And then you see somebody do it, you know, especially like Tom, where it's like, oh yeah, nobody's gonna knock that guy his, you know, his tenure at the unit at the highest echelons. Yeah, that is what we need, right? We need these guys, or Tom Spooner, right? Another great example with Warrior's Heart, these guys that are legends in the community. When you look at that guy, the guys can go, oh shit, if he can do it, I can do it. Right. Sometimes that's what it takes, is like the courage to to step out there into the into the the kill zone and say, like, hey, I'm gonna start taking shots of this thing. And people are gonna fall on my ass. Like, we're gonna follow. We never let one man go alone. Like, all right, cool. But it it takes a one man fucking hitting the breach and being like, all right, we're doing it, man. We're going. We're gonna start having this conversation. No more of this bull, like, we cannot continue to lose brothers like this. We cannot just like no more excuses to say, like, man, I wish we would have had that conversation. Fuck that, man. Like, if you you hit the nail on the head earlier, um, on on the side of like, hey, there is a level of you have to understand that even when guys seem like they're okay, you know in your gut when you need to have that conversation with a guy, right? And stop feeling uncomfortable to have the hard conversation. That's what you you learn through a lot of these streams. It's like sometimes you got to look it right in the eyes and say, hey man, are you thinking about doing something to yourself? Right. And and I can say that from a place of because I've been in those moments, right? I'm not doing it as accusative or judgmental. I'm saying, hey, brother, I feel like there's something we need to have a conversation about. Let's go, you know, let's go have a chat, right? Um, you know, then there's multiple areas that we can have the conversation of like I think the the important thing is that we get to a place where we're actually recognizing that we come back to that analogy of the pendulum swing, right? Hey, just because you have the conversation about I'm struggling and I need help doesn't mean you're not going to get back to a place where people are highly impressed with what you do as an individual. That's the next step, right? You have so much more fight left in you. Let's figure out what that next mission looks like, what that purpose looks like. But first, you got to be the best version of yourself. Just like when you walked into the team room for the first time, right? I'm a brand new green beret. All I can bring to the table is right time, right place, right uniform. You better be a PT stud. You better know your MOS well. You'll learn everything else. Shut your mouth, sit in the corner, speak up when you need to, but it's to some degree, we have to be at the highest level of like we we've got to take care of ourselves, or else we can't be a good husband, we can't be a good father. There's just no, there's no way around it because then you're just kind of putting band-aids on arterial bleeds trying to trying to make everything work.

SPEAKER_00

So yeah. You know, I I want to I want to take a moment to really dive into your journey in that post-military life, because like like I said earlier, man, like these stories are a PDSS for the next guy. Like when you were coming through that transition, dude, like we now know that for a lot of us, it's a very difficult, no matter how much we try to prep, taking the uniform off, taking the beret off, not being tied to that anymore. That is a shift for everybody, whether you're an 88 Mike in a motor pool or the S1 kid, when you leave and you transition out of the military, it is a significant change in your life. And what was that that journey like for you?

Transition Lessons School Trades Entrepreneurship

SPEAKER_01

Um I didn't do myself any favors. I I it definitely was rough, man. I came right off a rotation to Eastern Europe. I was doing SFL tap in my hotel room in Eastern Europe. And like I said, I was pretty jaded because I was stuck overseas. And you know, I went over there with the best intentions to get a new 18 Delta spun up with the team, and then things start popping up and getting hot. And so it was like, hey, we need you in country. And I'm sitting there going, like, I'm not the cog in the machine that's gonna like hold this all together, right? Um, but at the end of the day, I'm glad I was there because it was good to be there with the team for the morale boost. But coming home was very jaded. So I say that because I basically just like out of spite was like, you know, screw this. I'm gonna throw myself into the next thing. Like, I'm gonna throw myself fully into the next thing that comes. And I literally overlapped my terminal leave with my next career. Being in, you know, being a builder. It's for like three months of like getting paid paid by the army, and I'm just like now I'm getting screamed at by people building houses, nice people, but it's like I just took one thing and traded it for the other. And you know, I always describe it as like, especially on the civilian side, right? Man, you can go grind your bones in the dust just like you did in the team room, except the mission's not the same, right? People will let you do it all day long. The reality is you need to have expectation management, right? Because there's a lot of things that I deeply took for granted in my time in service. You know, and I look back now, and obviously I don't regret anything, but had I not been so jaded and so resentful, I think maybe I got a few more years out of my career, maybe not, but it would have been a lot healthier transition. But things that I took for granted in just the baseline for, like you said, any service member, not just soft, just in in general, any service member, right time, right place, right uniform. Your 100% is like most people's 40 to 50 percent. And so having an expectation, right? We all laugh because obviously civilians don't understand that, but when you come out, you need to understand that it's a different mentality, right? And it is people appreciate your service, but to some degree, it's like you get a fresh start, which can be a beautiful thing if you have the right perspective and right gratitude. But a lot of people will take it as almost a knock of like, well, I thought I was gonna be handed something because I, you know, I serve the country. It's like, no, you know, that people will appreciate that and it might get your foot in the door, but you really do need to do the, you got to go do the legwork to figure out what do you want to do, right? Like, is it a trade school? Is it going back to school? Is it um, you know, studying something in particular? You need to take that time to assess that. And if that means taking time off between service time and and uh a career, then go do it, man. Like that's what the GI Bill is for. Go, go get an education. And you may not know right away what you want to do. That's okay. It's okay to be 30 some, you know, 38, 42 years old and go into college on campus, man. Like, have excitement about that. It's awesome, man. It's a cool challenge and opportunity. You know how many kids end up being like, they love to hear that experience? Stop, stop. Like, we have got to be willing to be as vulnerable as we were drunk in a team room in the side of like our healing and our mentality shift of like, not everybody's out to judge you. Not everybody's out to be like, God forbid, no, you know, in one instance in your life, nobody knows you're a Green Beret. It's okay, right? It's right, like do you know exactly what I'm talking about?

SPEAKER_00

The greatest thing I could have done for myself is bet on myself, go the entrepreneur route, and go to school. Like, really, really invest in my education. Really, like if if nothing else for me, just to prove that I was capable of. There's something to healing that after being told like you're too stupid to succeed in life from multiple high school teachers. Ms. Baldino, uh tons of wonderful, tons of wonderful educators uh that um poured in me in a negative way. And to be able to prove that, man, because like I will tell you, I've I've done harder things in the military than college, than my master's program. Calcs for free fall, you know, math for for being a sniper, uh, tons of things are more difficult than anything I was challenged. Like putting together a comprehensive budget for your J set and putting together your there's so many things that you guys are and gals are doing in the military that are way harder and more difficult than college. And if it's in the cards, or at least if there's just a tiny little bit of desire to learn something new, to get a degree, please. I'm telling you, go do it. Use Vogue Rehab, the one of the most underutilized programs out there. And I will tell you a shameless plug, not to take too much airtime away from Trevor. Vocational rehab is an employment track. It really, truly is. Their number one thing is to get you employable. But that often means going back to school for a degree. If you want to be a doctor, there's a pathway to it. If you want to be a lawyer, there's a pathway to it. If you want to become the next great, whatever the fudge you're thinking of, there's a pathway to it. And I can help you, or tons of other people that have come on this show can help you. Reach out to me, sechol podcast at gmail.com. I will put you in contact with tons of people that can help you from lived experience. But I will tell you right now, it's one of the greatest resources. I'm proud of it. That's see, I graduated with honors. There's my little strings over there. No big deal. No big deal. 4.0 nearly my entire college career. When I say that, because if I can do it, I had to use a supplemental math guide in the 18 Bravo course. I'm just saying, I'm not that friggin' smart. I'm not that guy. I just have incredible work ethic and a can-do mentality. And uh with a little bit of prayer and a little bit of uh uh support from your family members, you can do it too. Here's another great plug. I I will tell you, go to ASU online, Arizona State University online. Uh, apply for the Pat Thoman Scholarship. Um, proud, three-time non-select. I'm not what it takes. I don't have insight to be selected for that. Uh, not that I'm bitter or anything. Assholes. But I will say, throw yourself, throw it, throw your name in the hat. Be willing to dare, be willing to dream again, because I'm telling you, we need more veterans in academia. We need more veterans in those discussion boards. Because one thing I realized when I looked in the discussion board, it's a lot of baristas from Starbucks. It's a lot, it's a lot of single, single white females. And every once in a while there was a veteran in there. And I enjoyed being able to reply back to a veteran because at least I knew that somebody else was out there dreaming of something bigger and wanting something more out of life. Those made for great conversation versus having conversations with Janae, the 20-year-old barista in uh Rockford, Illinois. Not the greatest discussion board.

SPEAKER_01

She's still getting after it on a degree, you know?

SPEAKER_00

So she's getting after it. She was getting after it, but uh boy. You see the goodness of all people, right?

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, dude. Oh, yeah. I mean, there's something to be said about that, right? Is like just the courage to try. The courage to just like you had the courage to sign on the dotted line, right? We we we talk about this all the time. How many times do you have that conversation with a kid you run into that's like, oh, I was just uh idiot, Mike, I was just uh loggy, whatever. First of all, stop that, right? Because you're such a small percentage of individuals in this country that was willing to have the courage to try to sign on the dotted line. I don't give, I don't care what your motivation was to do it, you did it, right? And it will, it will shape you for the rest of your life. It's something you should be deeply proud of, right? And we think about weekends like this, obviously, Memorial Day is vastly different than Veterans Day, but you have a connection to a fraternity that forever will be something you have aligned to. And so having that courage to now take the next chapter, right? I think the more we start to frame our perspective of like, hey, my service to this country is something to be deeply proud of, whether I did 35 years or I did five years, but it's just a chapter of my book. And it's a long book, man. Like it's a long, long book. And and you get to write the next chapter. Like, what do you want that to look like, right? There is, I can tell you from the construction side, there's such a deep need for people in the trades. If you think you would be good on the trade side, man, go make a lot of money being a tradesman. Blue collar is is back up and coming, baby. Like, right now, AI is not taking those jobs.

SPEAKER_00

Bro, AI will not be taking the job of an electrician, a welder, friggin' uh AC guy, uh, HVAC guy, especially a business owner. Like, I'm telling you, here's another resource. If you're an entrepreneur and you're looking for a leg up in the business world, Warrior Rising all day, every day. Warriorising.com. My editor's gonna hate this. I hope I don't forget. Click here. Go to there, go there, scan, scan this QR code to Warrior Rising. Skew, scan that one or scan the one over by Trevor. He's gonna hate that. I'm sorry, you're the best frigging editor that I have ever met, and you're the you're no one's better than you. And I appreciate you doing this for me. Just right there. Scan that one, scan that one. He's gonna hate me. But I'm telling you, bet on yourself, be willing to dream again. Shout out to you, Pete, because you're in this now. You're about to be finally free. One of my best buddies from the 82nd, another SF cat that's finally retiring. And uh, I'm telling him to go back to school or go get an MBA because he's gonna be a business owner. He's inheriting a business. And uh that's pretty dope. But what if you could also get that business degree to under to learn at least a little bit more and have some greater insight? Because being the military prepares you for a lot more than we think. But if you get a degree in something, it can help you at least be more marketable. And that's my thing is how can you be more marketable, make money while you're going to school, then use that money to buy stuff that you need, like a brand new drone or anything, whatever you want to do. Put it in your, you know, your wife doesn't have to know about what you're doing with your benefits money. Buy what you want, dog. There's another inside. But Trevor, before you run out of time, man, I want you to dive into like how did you start with the kind on the incline?

Kind on the Incline Honors Nick

SPEAKER_00

How did that come about, man? And and I I love these stories because like we we just found out we have another mutual friend that did the same thing in Florida with the Savage Floop. How did this come to be?

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, shout out DR, man. Um, yeah, no, I mean, I think uh that speaks to it, right? Like I everybody says it right, like last hard class. I came up in a class. Um, for some reason, it just seemed like it was full of savages, right? And so everybody was so about physical fitness. And it was around the same time that Nick came into the into the course. I met Nick and student company. Um, there's some wild, wild times of wild stories about that. Um, just just absolute dogfight smoke sessions. But um you get this experience with guys that are prior service, especially that have this like they have this desire, they latch on to 18x-rays, and you just have this mutual like agreement. You you track towards each other, right? DR is an example. The guys that run um Savage Loop, great example. Nick was such a he was just such a gravitational pull for a lot of guys that were already high performers. Like he was such a savage, such an animal. It was like those guys looked at Nick and were like, who is this dude? You know, yeah. He, you know, former Force Recon Marine, um, from Hawaii originally, served out in Cali, um, served with a lot of legends, like Abate, for the Marines, you'll know that name. Um, Earl Plumley served with Earl and then chased Earl into Special Forces, right? He came the um he came from Marine Corps to SF. So, prior service dude, a lot of experience. He just became a mentor to a lot of us um in a lot of ways through the course, and then we all formed a deep friendship. Nick, in particular, for me, was like, yeah, we we formed a bond, but when I got selected and went to Sokum, my brother was actually finishing soccer and was going to the course. You know, and he's he's my he's a grown man, he's becoming a green beret, but he's my younger brother. You're always you always have that like protective mentality. Nick really just like naturally became like my younger brother's older brother by proxy. They became very close. They went through the entire course together. So I'll always be so indebted and grateful to Nick for just looking out for you know my bro. And so Nick became, you know, we all stayed close. When I went to 10th and I and I was heading to that rotation in Afghanistan, Nick was just like, it was like that first guy that reached out and was like, hey man, I just want you to think about these things, right? These are probably things that people aren't talking to you about, but like keep your head on a swivel, look for this stuff. Speaking from a really like mentor mentee experience of like, hey, protect your heart, protect your mind, these kind of things, because he had been there and he experienced that stuff. And then, you know, just I I loved being in that group of high performing and just pushing the limits, athletes, right? Savage loop, the kind on the incline. This is the kind of stuff we were doing in the Q course. Guys are going and doing the JFK 50 miler. Again, like, dude, one of my favorite stories to tell about Nick, SLC, August, September of uh in North Carolina, hot as can be, right? We're sitting in class one day in the cadre text us, and we're like, yo, just a heads up, uh, Tucker Gym, um the AC is broken, so probably not a good idea to go there. So obviously everybody's like, we're going to the Globo gym, whatever one down in 80 second land. Not five minutes later, dude. I get a text message from old Nick. He's like, hey, brother. He's like, let's hit talks after after class. And that's just how he was, man. It was like if there was an opportunity to suffer, like just to, and it's like nobody needed to see it. He didn't care if anybody knew. He just wanted to push himself. This dude goes in there for over an hour and he's just doing plate pushes on the turf and the Jacobs ladder. He's getting ready for another selection, but that's just who he was, man. And so when we lost Nick in 2022, like I said, you know, you get that call. I got it, I got the call from I think my brother. Um, it just it shifts your entire perspective. It it shifted my perspective on my healing journey, it shifted my perspective on was I was capable of getting to that point? Because Nick was he was never the guy that I would have ever thought, right? So then it makes you both equally aware of your own mortality and of your own vulnerability in these things. And so, in a lot of ways, Nick's passing and the way he passed really was a catalyst for me in healing, in my healing journey. Um, and you know, I won't go into the nitty-gritty details, but from 2022 into the first year we did to Kine was 2024. That period of my life was like some of the roughest years for my wife and I and my family, because I was really ripping the band-aid off of healing, ripping the scab off. But if it weren't for Nick, I really don't think I would have survived that. Uh to be truly honest with you, because his passing was the motivation to say, like, I've got to, I've got to heal myself for my kiddos, for Nick, for his family, for Sid, you know, for Maddox and Leilani, for his kiddos. It's like, I owe them to live a life worthy of Nick. And so that's what led into decine. 2024 was a crazy year. I got baptized in April of 2024. Spiritual warfare hit immediately. I know you you can resonate deeply. Like it was just like you opened the gates and it was like, all right, here it comes. And again, my brother comes to my rescue. It was like something inside me, I always wanted to do something for Nick, and I knew it had to be crazy. Um struggling with mental health, struggling in my marriage, struggling. I lost my job at the beginning of May of 2024. And instead of getting in the pit of misery, it was like, hey, let's do something hard for Nick. And it was just like timing was perfect. So, you know, Manague Springs Inclined right here in town. Um, already an arduous thing to do a single time. Um, I had that community out there is very big on like challenges, and so they'll do like 24-hour challenges every once in a while. I was like, hey man, I've done this a couple times. This would be a really cool thing to do to honor Nick. And so the first year in 2024, I went out and did it solo, um, basically solo support. I had some couple buddies come out and rotate with me. It was really just like a mental health thing for me and and for Nick. We raised over $10,000 for the All Secure Foundation, um, just grassroots, dumb nug, 18 Brelta was just like throwing stuff together and and realized like, oh my, there's something to this. So um I ended up doing like 15, almost 16 laps that year because my goal was uh Everest, you know, is the equivalent of sea level to Everest in elevation. And I did it, um, absolutely broken off. But you know, the guys out at Savage Loop are like, dude, whatever that is, we want to be a part of that. So, you know, that's where De Kine came from. It was like and to Nick's family, it's like it's a window back to who he is to them, right? Nick will never be to them, and he should never be to them how he left this earth. He is how he lived his life, and that's how we will continue to honor him because we know, we know that that was a battlefield KIA, that was a battlefield casualty delayed, right? There's no way around it, right? I just know who that man is. I know that it wasn't a weak man, it was a man in a moment of weakness. That's that's all it is, right? And and to have the opportunity to honor him in the way that he lived, to do it like all gas, no breaks, suffer well, right? We talk about all these things. It's what it's all about, man. So we're gonna continue to honor Nick, we're gonna continue to do it every year. We're gonna push the limits, right? We love having, you know, Security Hall's been such a wonderful support of this, um, to support the Special Forces Foundation and the connections to the regiment. It's amazing. But at the end of the day, it's like it's about honoring our brothers. And this year was a testament to that, right? I'm excited for people to see the video Brian's putting together because it was the first year we had multiple guys out rotating for 24 hours and several guys that were uh knew Nick personally. So you're gonna get a real snippet of like, hey, what motivated these guys to do this? It's Nick, man. It's it's Nick.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, dude, that's that's a beautiful part

Brotherhood Gratitude Faith and Resources

SPEAKER_00

of it. When we were brainstorming on how not only Security Help, but how we could get Brian involved to just amplify the message, to put something beautiful together. The main thing that I was concerned with is like, look, we make money for the foundation. That's great. Uh, you know, the needs, the need and the requirement is there. Like we need a fundraise to support our brothers in the regiment. But the number one thing I wanted was the brotherhood. The, the, the, the, the inception and and the the thought process behind Project Reach uh was connection to get guys together. And I think that was like, dude, if we get like four bucks, that's awesome. But if we get like four or five people around Trevor to go out there and demonstrate the brotherhood, because the number one thing that we need to worry about, the number one thing that I want people to understand, some money's a great thing. It it comes through and it supports and gets guys to treatment centers. It provides emergency relief to families that need it well. Um, but it's the connection. It's the brotherhood, man. That's the one thing. Like, dude, being a singleton and Alabama, not always fun. But I'm connected through my the virtual chats, the brotherhood blueprint signal chats, my own signal chats with my friends, like the meme wars in Instagram. But man, the brotherhood, connecting and having real people. When I started seeing that in the signal chat, the people that were showing up, the people were dropping off, Tanya, uh, dropping off subs, all these people coming through and being there. I'm like, dude, the the the well-up of tears to be able to say, like, that's that's the thing that we need. More brotherhood, more connection, man. And I know you were feeling it. I know like being able to like live in that chat group and see see you chatting back and forth with people and seeing the pictures. I was like, home freaking run, man. Home freaking run.

SPEAKER_01

We we could probably do another 30 minutes to an hour just on like what everything that transpired this weekend. Um, but I'll just say that like I'm overwhelmed, profoundly overwhelmed by the reaction, the donations, the involvement, the individuals that came out and participated, um, not only the the the guys that climbed, but the people that brought out food, the people that supported. Um just there's no way, there's no other way for me to put it but divine providence, right? The the people that were there when they were there for the things that happened, it was it happened exactly how it was supposed to, right? And there was a magic to um how many laps were done and how it was done, the amount of distance that was done, just everything about it, man. I could like it exceeded my expectations, which is so exciting for me because I'm like, dude, it now it just sets the bar even higher for next year. And there's so much room for growth in what we can do with it. Obviously, you and I have had conversations. I'm so stoked about what will come down the line from this in like connecting the network of guys doing this stuff. Yeah. Um, because that's what this is about, right? Is like we we say it, it's all these taglines because it's easier to remember, but like reminding yourself that you have so much more fight left in you, whether it's like you know, overland missions or you're gonna go do um mountaineering or alpining, or you're gonna get into backcountry skiing or long distance races or whatever. The thing, the reason those things appeal to our community is because they are, they're at that high echelon of performance, which you know, we we have to remind ourselves of like we still have a lot of fight left in us and the capacity to do these things is really important to um give yourself the chance to do that. Right. So let's build a network of guys that are out there. I mean, dude, there's there's so many groups that are doing like mountain bike meetups, and and you know, um, there's elite groups that are doing like equine programs. I went to an equine program where it was like week on Monday, we were uh round penning and bareback riding, and we were just like stiff, you know, soft dudes, seals and green berets, like like looking like idiots. By Friday, I shoot you not, like we were horseback, we were roping cattle horseback. And so there's there's programs out there that we can get you connected with where it's not like this, you're not walking a horse around on a lead rope, right? You're like high high performance athlete. They're bringing out national rain cow horsemen that are like experts in their craft that are going, who are these guys? Who who what group is this that they're just like you you talk more crap to them and they do better, right? Like they're they were their minds were blown. They were like, oh, dude, if you get these guys fired up, they just like it's like they go to another level. Like, yeah, remind yourself you have that in you, right? And and now it's time to put it behind something else, right? The capacity to serve, right? To give back, right? For you and I, that's a big deal because it's a part of our faith. But regardless of whether you're in their your faith journey or not, coming to a place of healing, finding the modalities of healing that work for you. Um, I think that why certain things are working, right? Especially like in the psychedelic realm or in like the divine realm of faith, is because it's such a, it's so um, it's it's a tangible and catalytic change, right? Nothing done in moderation, once again. So you're doing something that's a massive shift, and you're saying, like, hey, I'm I'm throwing myself behind something that feels tangible, it's ritual, it's it's got it's reverence to it. Um, I'm gonna go find that. But all of it is, all of it ties back to your community, right? There is somebody out there that has done something, they've experienced the same exact things, same symptoms, all these things. They have very similar likes and interests, and they can connect you with a group that is super into mountain biking or is very keyed up on you know, hiking or trail running or whatever. You gotta, you gotta be tied into the community, man. Brotherhood Blueprint, um, having these organizations that are Soft Hub is another great one.

SPEAKER_00

Yes.

SPEAKER_01

That really, really, you know, and you talk about like studs in the regiment, like our wives, these wives that are just stepping up and like are just absolute gangsters. Like, nope, uh, you know, that this organization doesn't exist, so I'm gonna create it, right? Because my husband needed it, so I'm gonna do it, right? Uh tell my wife all the time they should have handed her the Green Beret when I graduated, because she's way more gangster than me. And it's just, yeah, what a blessing it is to get the opportunity to have a shift in perspective on life, right? For me now it's gratitude. I had a pastor tell me right right after, right before, right after I got baptized, he said, you know, I just told him my whole spiel, my whole sob store for lack of a better term, my whole testimony. And he looks me in the eyes like a pastor does, sweet as convenient. He's like, hey, basically, like, get your crap together, right? He's like, you know, you're choosing to be miserable, right? Like, because every day is a choice, what you focus on. And so he was, you know, his whole thing was like, hey, do you know that the antidote to anxiety, depression, worry, trepidation is gratitude? Anxiety cannot exist in a grateful heart. And that sounds so trivial until you connect it, right? For me and for you, it's the Lord, right? We we find gratitude in even suffering. Even suffering. How do you suffer well? How do you go to a place where you're like, this is such a blessing to get this opportunity? I've got air in my lungs, I'm taking another step. Yeah, my legs hurt, but look, I got my buddy that's coming down the stairs. He's on one lap ahead of me. Let's go, dude. Let's go. Yeah, let's push it.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. Dude, it's funny. I I something I run into a lot is um people complaining about their blessings. Got so much work, man. Got all this song. I'm like, dude, take a moment and pause. Like, you got a job that pays you X amount of money, bro. Think back in the team room. If you were able to time travel and tell that, tell that young 18 act how much money you're making on the outside, you think you'd be complaining? I mean, I understand it, stress, but at the same time, like I changed that narrative for myself. Oh, I gotta stay up by late, I gotta do this. I'm like, okay. I get to. I get to do this for a living, I get to make money off something people laughed at and said wasn't gonna be possible. Yep. I'm still here, I'm still doing this. Like that, let's let's fucking go, folks. Like, yes, dude.

SPEAKER_01

Yes, man. And like let's let's normalize, like championing each other in in the journey after life, right? Like journey after service, brother. Like, I I I'm telling you guys, we're here to celebrate you. We're here to support your your company, your entrepreneurial endeavor. The regiment is there and we want to support, right? Stop thinking that you're you're disconnected. It's not this like you're out on an island afterwards. If you treat yourself that way, you will be, right? But man, we don't want it to be that way. We do not want it to be that way because I'm telling you, from both of our experience, wherever you think you are that you feel like nobody else could have been there, we've been there, dude. We've we have been there, we've been in that dark place, we've been in that hole. There's probably about 25 guys I could put you on a group chat with right now that have been through that. But there are profound things happening in our communities in particular that just, man, there there's there's so much good to look forward to. There's so much joy and goodness to look forward to. It's not this like I called it the doom loop, right? What's happening in the world? The woe is me. I'm not connected to the regiment anymore. I don't know what's going on. I don't know what the rips look like, what's about to happen. Like, I get it, man. It's a fear of am I gonna be enough? Am I gonna take care of my family? Right? You go into that full prepper mode. We've all had it where we're like stocking stuff in the garage. You know, for me, the blessing is like now I look at it, I'm like, it's it's I could plan for six months, but at the end of the day, like I truly believe that there's a there's a divine plan to all of this, right? The Lord would much rather have me have an honest, fruitful, tangible conversation with somebody out on the stairs or at the supermarket or with my kids, learning how to apologize to my kids or having that healing, loving relationship with my sons to teach them how to be good men, right? We're called to be the bishops of our household, right? We we believe these things because we've now given that we've been given this gift of the window into what life is supposed to look like, right? My my patron saying is Saint Joseph for a reason, right? Because we were sold this idea of masculinity by the world of like bravado, machismo, alpha male, more money, more status. Get your green beret and everything will be fixed. The metaphors on the stairs don't end, right? There's a false summit when you come up to step 2200 and you got about 500 more steps to go, or 600 more steps to go. It feels like a false summit when you hit that stuff. You're like, dude, I thought this was it. I thought this was gonna solve all my problems because you forgot that it's not about the the end goal. It's like it's about the journey, man. Like, and learning how to like suffer well, endure the embrace the suck, right? Whatever mantra you want to use. Like, but when you can find the beauty in those moments, dude, the power that you overtake in your life, the power that it gives you to be this like your wife looks at you differently, your kids look at you differently, you start feeling like that GB again. You feel like the dude that just showed up at the team room because you are that guy again. And I'm telling you, man, you all, first of all, you all deserve it. You all deserve to be happy, and you all deserve to find your next endeavor. We want to help you do that, and it's possible, right? So let's go, let's go set the standard, right? Let's get a con out for what this mission looks like and let's let's punch out the door with your boys. Right? We've never done anything alone. So, like, let's make it happen, right?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, we're here to help. Absolutely, dude. Absolutely. And I couldn't think of a better, better way to end it, man. Um, actually, no, I do. If you're a Green Beret and you're struggling and you don't know where to turn to, I got the answer for you. Special Forces Foundation will actually too. Get with God and uh also reach out to Special Forces Foundation. I know. I know faith is a big part of my life and it's a big part of Trevor's life. So we're gonna highlight a little bit more and we're gonna talk about it a little bit more because I'm telling you, there's a shift happening out there. And when we share our stories and finding our faith and finding our way, it gives others the encouragement to do so. And uh after spending, you know, an entire week with my brother John Wayne Walding, I just felt so empowered to continue sharing it because, dude, we're here to live a great life. We don't know how long we got, we got to make the most of it. And while we're here, we got to be honest in truth, truthful with the things that help us. And one of those things is getting connected with uh that last domain, spirit. It's your faith, man. Uh, but if you need help and you're a green beret out there, please consider reaching out to Special Forces Foundation. Their information is in the link or in the episode description. Just go there. I'll wait. I'll pause. You know, Spiel, the episode's almost over. Click that link, head on over there, put a request for help. No matter what it is, we'll take it in consideration and we reach back out. I think we average uh being able to get back to people within 24 hours. So within 24 hours, you're gonna get connected to a Green Beret or Katie Maskey, Chief of Programs, and you're gonna have an answer and a resource that can help you. So stop shying away from it. Reach out today. Um there's nothing that we can't help you with, um, no resource, no program that we won't be willing to look at and figure out if we can help you with it. Because after signing that dotted line, after going through selection, after going through the Q course, you earned it. You earned our support, brother. Uh, and you're not alone. So reach out today. If anything else, I mean, if nothing else, you get connected to Brotherhood Blueprint. And that's a great place to laugh and share wins and uh connect with other green berets that uh are probably missing you too. So if you're out there, please consider joining, consider donating. If you need anything, please reach out. PsychOpPodcast at gmail.com. I'm Denny Caballero. That's been Trevor Murray. We're proud of you. So please continue striving for more, continue growing, and we'll see you all next time. Until then, take care.