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The only Mental Health podcast that shares honest and authentic accounts of living with mental health issues, that's also hosted by individuals fighting the same fight you are!Providing information and resources for help with a heavy dose of humor and entertainment. Helping you find hope and the strength to fight on.
Security Halt!
Episode 198: Skydiving for Healing: Daniel Kronz's Journey from Trauma to Triumph
What if the adrenaline rush of skydiving could be a path towards healing trauma? Join us as we uncover the fascinating story of Dan K., a seasoned guerrilla warfare expert turned passionate skydiver. Dan shares how skydiving became an essential part of his recovery journey from PTSD and TBI, alongside his time at Laurel Ridge Treatment Center. His narrative is not just about the thrills of free-fall but also about the depths of personal struggles, from surgeries and a harrowing divorce to the near loss of his child, all while balancing an academic pursuit at the prestigious Wharton School of Business.
Listen to a raw conversation about the invisible wounds faced by military personnel. Dan opens up about the dark realities of addiction and mental health issues that plague many service members. Through the lens of role models and personal experiences, we explore the destructive cycle of addiction, its ripple effects on family life, and the arduous path to sobriety. This episode critically examines high-stress environments' reliance on alcohol and proposes a reevaluation towards alternatives like medicinal marijuana. The overarching theme is the importance of addressing these unseen scars and making healthier life choices.
Finally, discover the incredible work behind Renewed Heights Ahead, a nonprofit organization co-founded by Dan and his partner Kevin, aimed at assisting veterans and first responders through skydiving. This segment highlights the collective spirit and significant support from the skydiving community, featuring inspiring collaborations with prominent figures. The episode emphasizes the power of community support in promoting mental health and healing. Whether you're a veteran, a first responder, or someone passionate about mental health, Dan's story and the mission of Renewed Heights Ahead will inspire you to get involved and make a difference. Visit renewedheights.org to learn more and support this crucial cause.
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Be sure to follow Dan on LinkedIn: Dan Kronz and head over to renewedheights.org and help support Dan and his new mission!
Produced by Security Halt Media
security hot podcast. Let's go with an expert in guerrilla warfare, with a man who's the best with guns, with knives, with his bare hands, a man who's been trained to ignore, ignore weather to live off the land job was disposed of enemy personnel to kill period interrupt, we'll just roll with it man, dank rods from renewed heights.
Speaker 1:Welcome to the secured out podcast, man. I'm excited to dig into this. Um, as a free fall guy, as somebody that ultimately dreamt of spending his entire time on a free fall team, I can tell you skydiving is something that is near and dear to my heart. Uh, and your web, your webpage, uh, summarizes it perfectly. Uh, you have that quote by Leonardo da Vinci.
Speaker 1:Uh, once you have been in the sky and, as I like to say it, like to say you experience the ability to be a flying meat missile, there's not much you can do on Earth that will make you feel like you've done something great. It's always those moments of doing a high lift track, of connecting with a friend in free fall and locking in. You're just like holy shit, this is the greatest thing on earth, and we kind of miss those moments of awe and coming across you. Thank goodness we have a mutual friend who put us in contact. This is that therapeutic moment of understanding just how big the world is and being able to experience something as amazing as free fall. You guys are right, it's something that can change your life for the positive. So today, dan, I want to dig into your nonprofit and dig into your journey my man.
Speaker 2:Well, first, thank you for having me. Please let me know if there's any like video or audio issues and I'll see if I can correct that. But yeah, so I think, maybe sharing a little bit about my journey here and feel free to interrupt or ask questions. But yeah, so I think, maybe sharing a little bit about my journey here and feel free to interrupt or ask questions. What led to where I am now? It was a week away, or I was a week post graduating from Wharton School of Business with my MBA. I was still active duty and right after that I ended up at a Laurel Ridge inpatient treatment facility Prior to being there.
Speaker 1:No way we got to, we got to pause right there. I am also an alumni of Laurel Ridge Treatment Center my man at Mission 100. So, as we say, center, my man at mission 100. So, uh, as we say, try, baby, tribe that place, uh, saves lives and it will change you for the better. So I just wanted to just hit it, hit that right off the bat and just say, yes, we are together, we're a part of an amazing tribe. And uh, yeah, dude, please continue on.
Speaker 2:I just wanted to make because, like afterwards, I'm gonna have to email you you know, like sometimes we go to like art class. I really got into that and I made yes, I got a huge rock. They let me bring back in and put a seventh group, you know, um, the regimental crest on there, and I got some pictures I can send you. But it was kind of like I knew other seventh group guys were there. There were seven group guys when I was there and I just needed to kind of put my stake in the ground and I also appreciate you being like yo dude, I was there too, because you know I've listened to your podcast and I your vulnerability is what allows others to be vulnerable, and I've noticed that with what I'm doing. Just hey, man, here's where I'm sucking. Here are the areas that I'm struggling with, and it's that paradox of security allows vulnerability, but you need vulnerability to feel secure, and so it's like who's going to start?
Speaker 1:Yeah, man.
Speaker 2:So the day I showed up to Laurel Ridge was June 11th, and so I'm now just over two years sober.
Speaker 1:I'm an addict.
Speaker 2:And staying strong in that the accountability is huge. And so, shortly after my time at Laurel Ridge, I started doing intensive outpatient with my therapist, who I'm working with now Ended up at STAR. I know you're familiar with STAR. For anybody who's not, you know the quick and down and dirty. It's a va facility. Uh, they helped mainly special operations with tbis and uh, my last deployment was with uh oda 7223. We were in hellman. They're essentially we're doing missions every, every like 96 hours. We're just ripping really hard. Yeah, um, a lot of dudes got purple hearts. It was a pretty intense deployment.
Speaker 2:Needless to say, the TBIs I had received had helped my life dismantle, and so, the day I showed up to business school to rewind a little bit, a good buddy of mine was formerly on my team a guy by the name of Andy Marcassano died by suicide and was my fourth friend to do so that I had deployed with and been in combat with, and shortly after Andy, I had two more friends that I served with. And so you know, we're on this very like tipping point in my life. And the war in Afghanistan ends in 2021, which just like ripped my heart out. The war in Afghanistan ends in 2021, which, just like, ripped my heart out. And during my time at business school, between the time we pulled out and when I med boarded out of the military, I had four surgeries and four epidurals on top of like untreated, undiagnosed PTSD and TBI. So during that time you know multiple friends dying by suicide, pregnant wife at the time we get divorced and our second born almost dies in birth. He was first three days of life. He had to be put on ice and kept at a core body temperature of 92 degrees.
Speaker 2:I'm going through mid terms. I get divorced April 22, graduate May 22. My life's erupting and thankfully I had the right people in the right places to include my warrant. Who came down to Philadelphia and was like yo, bro, you need to go to inpatient. And I was like I got this and I bought an RV, took my two kids down to Florida and my firstborn's godfather is a E8 and seventh group team sergeant. I think he just finished his team time and he's like Dan, you're a great dad, but I've never seen you like this, you need to go to inpatient, bro. And so dropped the kids back off with their mom, did inpatient, did star, and then went to Fort Belvoir to do my med board and so you know during that time.
Speaker 2:I've had a lot of healing, a lot of growth and I still have a lot of work to do. But last summer, after having my kids, I got certified by Army United. So anybody who doesn't know about Army United certifications education for free. You don't owe anything back. Like it's amazing.
Speaker 2:Yeah, dude, and like, as you know, you spoke about, like, what it's like to skydive and I think, like you know, my parents, my mom specifically, is like oh, you're an adrenaline junkie and it's like dude, that it's not, it at all it is, it's the opposite of that. Um yeah, it's complete opposite.
Speaker 1:It's Zen, it's complete Zen, man. There's a reason why the culture latches on to point break so much and people don't understand it, dude. It's not about this adrenaline rush, like when you look at it, dude, you can hate it, you can clown on it. But you juxtapose Johnny, utah and Bodhi and that Zen appeal of like, fuck you, I'm going out to live, I'm going out there in the sky to live. That's the heart I mean in anybody that's been impatient and you can attest to it.
Speaker 1:In those moments where you're going through your trauma, you're going through everything and you're getting some answers, you're also dissecting your own life and you're getting to the points where, like, where were you the happiest? Where were you actually feeling like you were alive? And every time you're on that ramp with your friends and you're you know you're planning out your dive and then you actually dive out and you're doing great, amazing things and those brief seconds feel like a lifetime and you can. You can literally walk out of that bird on that last jump and for the rest of your life you're going to remember that last jump. I know I did, like the last time I jumped with the team is still like vividly and I can't remember how to get to my fucking house.
Speaker 1:I can't remember basic things, but I can tell you right now the first time I was able to link up in the air with a teammate. I can tell you the first time how it felt to be a free fall. Jm, there is something different about flying in the sky. There's something different. That piece, when you see the sunrise in Arizona, is completely different than anything you'll experience. And you're right, man, there's something to this and I can't believe that, like nobody else has found that link and has been willing to be like you know what, I'm going to start this nonprofit, Like um. But before we dive into that, man, there are so many things about your story that I want to pause and reflect on. We talk about loss and we talk about grief, but the individuals that you've lost and the people within regiment that we've lost by suicide, they don't just get forgotten, they become added weights into our rucksacks.
Speaker 1:And I know, in the specific incident of your friend, your teammate, Andy, that is somebody that was a legend in regiment and when you serve yeah, absolutely these people that once you serve with them on a team, people on the outside world, people through podcasts they only know about the heroics, they only know about the greatness that these people were. But the thing that's impactful is you know the human being and when you realize that we're not bulletproof and we can break, that puts another kink and another crack in your own veneer and your own outside facet that you show the world. That mask is now cracking. As you were going through Laurel Ridge, what were some of the things that you realized that you were dealing with? I know you mentioned briefly addiction. What were some things that you were dealing with before you were able to get help?
Speaker 2:So I I'd like to start with the first thing you talked about, like with Andy. For me and I could be mistaken, it was something like nine deployments. I mean he was like the toughest dude I knew, just like he really was man, like he was awesome. He left my team to go to three, five, to be a team sergeant, like savage man.
Speaker 2:Great NCO. I still keep in touch with his mom cat. She's an amazing woman and andy's fond like, always trying to, you know, promote that as well. Um, yeah, so when I feel like for me, when someone like that that does it, it almost gives you permission to in a weird way. You're like, well, dude, he was tougher than me, like I don't know, I I like found myself afterwards being like, oh dang, like if, if I do this, we're the second and third order effects. So one of the things I reflected on that was like really hard to swallow was I have two kids. We saw one of them just run in here. Who's three? Like the statistics on kids whose parents kill themselves is like disgusting.
Speaker 2:And so now, like now that I'm not in that place, I'm having to live through that like the, the bad narrative, the bad wolf. That's like, dude, you're such a piece, yeah, you're such a piece of shit, dude, oh, and it's like, and so like we start believing it and then it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy because we're just gonna blow up whatever's in our life, whatever's good. It's just like, oh, oh, oh bet, dude, I will cut off my nose to spite my face. And it's that impulsivity that like really started to scare me badly. That was like it was like emergency procedures I was cutting away to get into to get inpatient. And then, like, ever since then it's like I do EPs all the time because it's amazing how it's such a holistic problem.
Speaker 2:Because it's like, well, am I struggling with this? Because I drink myself to sleep? And then you know, I don't want to go to sleep because, for whatever reasons. And then I wake up and I can out, pt everybody, but I have these insecurities and I'm not eating well, so my sleep's all fucked and my body hurts. But if I go cpt and say something hurts, they might pull me from a team or I'm just gonna suck.
Speaker 2:And so like it's now you have this big ball of fuck and you haven't taken care of anything. And I think a lot of us look at like, oh, my knee hurts, I need knee surgery, no one gives you shit. But like, oh, bro, I saw you eating, ied really hard, and now you don't want to go to like invisible wounds because of a TBI. Yeah, so like that narrative is what I learned quickly. It's like, dude, no one is saying they went to inpatient, no one is saying that they're struggling with this stuff, like am I the only one that's pulling a milk jug out of the fridge and knock something down? I'm like God, like.
Speaker 2:God like that's not normal and so it was a lot of. This man was like really looking at myself like super, super real, and I don't think I could have done that for me, you know, without being sober, because like, as soon as you start introducing that booze or whatever it is for, for anybody else, it it's that number now and empathy is a real thing and I think I'm still good.
Speaker 1:Oh no, it's. Alcohol is a is a tricky one. Like I'm sober, I don't drink, and it's not because I'm. I'm lucky, I'm blessed. I turned to it as a way to deal with not being able to sleep, as a way to deal with anxiety, as a way to get out of my own what I was feeling, not being able to name it. I didn't know anything about emotions until I got help. We have a base emotion of angry, happy, sad, that's. It Couldn't put a word to what I was feeling, so I drank.
Speaker 1:On the backside of it getting better, I realized why do we drink? Why do so many of us drink? Why do we leave ourselves vulnerable to this enemy that's at the gate, which is alcohol. And I get it If you don't have an issue with it, if you don't have any anxiety, depression, mental health issues. It's cool, man, drink, have a beer with your friends.
Speaker 1:But here's my argument we're all about health and we're all about trying to find every single way that we could be more effective on the battlefield, at home, on a team, due to data crunching numbers. Does alcohol bring you closer to the best warrior you could be the best father, the best friend or does it take away? How does it enhance your life? Just simply do that exercise. Any of you choose to drink after that. Cool, then you made a choice on your own, on your own accord, to drink.
Speaker 1:But I would argue and say that once you do the data, if you do exactly what I just said, you'll realize that alcohol brings nothing in to the fight. It doesn't every. I mean. And there's like I'm a big advocate for, uh, medicinal marijuana and there's a place for it, but at the same spectrum, there's no place for alcohol. There's no, there's no positive to it. So that's my biggest thing, because it's so readily available to us when we're in the fight, when we're sitting there dealing with all these dark demons. Well, I know it's okay to drink, so we lean into it, like going through your own journey. How's it been being able to walk away knowing that you don't need that anymore?
Speaker 2:that's a really good question. Um, I think it's just, it's something that's always going to be there and I think I have to constantly remind myself of like what, what am I giving up what what? Because, like I do think, do I think I could like go have a beer at a barbecue? I think I really could, but it's that moderation is really hard, or you know, it's one, two, three, four, and then like what? So what does happen when, like the COA that I would, I was planning, like didn't plan out, I didn't have a backup, like.
Speaker 2:So it's constantly reminding myself of, like, where I was before and what I could lose, and when I have the ability to like catch that before it blows up, like that's what's keeping me in the game because, like, like there's times, like like a lot of us and this is where I'm at, like I'm all about, like you know, gun rights.
Speaker 2:You know I love my Glock 19. It's all tricked out, but, like there's no world, I keep in my car because, like, I know that, like, if I get cut off in traffic, like one thing leads to another and it's putting things in place that allow me to have like the right impulse control, like I can admit that that's okay. I mean, um, yeah, and I try to really focus on like I statements instead of like general statements, because I really don't want to speak for like a community or or anything like that, but like, these are definitely like my realities and it's you know? You know you asked me about like laura ridge and then like, since then, what have I learned? I think what I'm still learning and I still really struggle with is, like two things can be true and that's, that's the.
Speaker 2:That's what I'm trying to work out, you know? Um, yeah, I know a narrative that I've been talking to a lot of my teammates about. I'm fortunate enough that I'm a former 18 alpha that's still in the team chat with my old team, so I'm just like, but whatever. I did, I did something right Like you're a happy father.
Speaker 1:For those of you that don't understand, this means that this man kept his tribe after his time on a team and that's dude. This means that this man kept his tribe after his time on a team Dude. That is a hard thing that we don't talk about. I mean, I put a lot of memes out there. I tend to think that I reel you in with the poop and dick jokes into the seriousness of the podcast and there's a lot of jokes about officers, but you don't realize how difficult that is.
Speaker 1:You go through your entire junior officer career knowing that you want to go to selection, knowing you want to do this and you do it. And you go through all these hurdles, all this pain, all this fucking atrocious, fucking grinding to get on a team and then you only get two years Maybe, if you're lucky, maybe and then you're off to fucking staff world and then, if you get out, maybe you get added to the team chat. But being able to and that's like it sucks, because officers are there just as often. They're doing the work that nobody wants to do and they get shit on a lot. But I tell you this if you're a great officer you know it because the guys still talk to you. You're still on the team thread. You're still I mean just your story Having individuals that reached out.
Speaker 1:Then there's no closer bond than the warrant and team sergeant and captain, the tripod and the fact that yours were there with you. That says a lot about the person you are, the Green Beret you are, and how tight that bond was. And I know you probably reflect on that. But if you don't just know that at the very end of the day, those individuals care so much about you they're willing to be there for you in the middle of the worst. And that's a beautiful thing about having a team. And I know there's so many of us out there dealing with this stuff that you know you don't have that. But I'm telling you, reach out to your friends. There's one of the things that will always get you through on the other side when you're dealing with these things is having that network, having that, that tribe man, and I'm so glad you had you actually had that.
Speaker 2:We were literally doing Father's Day texts on Sunday like happy Father's Day.
Speaker 2:people talking shit Like I'm sure you could think of, like texts that were like popping off on that, but I was talking to my teammates about like something I felt like you know, august 2021, and we pulled out of Afghanistan and when I reflected on that before inpatient I it it was like so many feelings that came with that. Um to the best analogy I came up with so far is like I, I feel like at 36 years old, I found out like Santa Claus wasn't real and it was like what?
Speaker 1:what.
Speaker 2:And I went from like my whole life. Like how many times did you watch band of brothers, the Pacific? I recently watched airmen and you're like, dude, I'm a world war. Like I'm a world war ii vet. Like they hit the towers just like they did pearl harbor. We're clapping back and then you wake up and you're like, holy fuck, dude, I'm a vietnam vet. That's what it happened to me. Like that dude and that community, like I don't think like if you're a part of that, like talk about it, because like getting, like talking about it and getting those feelings out there and like just sharing, getting it off your chest, I think goes a long way. And so like 100.
Speaker 1:I think one of the the greatest blessings of this show is I was able to talk to individuals that were in the thick of helping our Afghan allies get out of there, like Lieutenant Colonel Retired Scott Mann, and then being able to reach into the Vietnam era side of the house with John Stryker-Meyer Tilt, being able to have him on the show and reflect, and we're literally reliving that. I mean, we talk about generational trauma when it comes to chronic stress, chronic stress and ptsd within our communities, but we don't. We don't talk about the, the trauma that we endured as service members in a specialized community. That stuff stays with us, like now we're reliving that. Who's to say the next generation of green berets won't be revisiting us with the next forever war, asking us how we felt. Yeah, it's that moral injury piece A lot of people don't talk about and I, just, like you, were saying instantly uh, my last tour was 2019 to 2020.
Speaker 1:And we knew, like we're closing up shop, like nothing was said but everything that was moving at the end of that tour. We're sitting there like thinking to ourselves, like remember, looking at my team sergeant and it's just like dude, this is it, this is the last combat trip and sure as shit, when we rotated out, covid came in and covid shut all the operations and and that little bit of understanding of like as we're watching it all fall apart. We're like holy shit. Holy shit. We were saying you're going to be held accountable, but the same is it being said for the individuals that run our military and it hurts.
Speaker 2:Like it hurts when it's just like you know what, what? Like what was all that for? Like wait, like time out, like real quick, like what were we doing here? And like you talked about, like I remember my first deployment with the regular Army, like they were cutting MAPVs in half because it was more expensive to ship them back to America. You know this was we were doing retrograde operations, war on Terror was ending and we're charging E4s that lost batteries to an embitter. And I'm just like, yeah, hold on a second, and you know you fast forward. It's 11 years later, man, so that I you know. And then I think you just have to realize that, like, I think the point that I'm the, the place where I'm getting to in life right now and I'm not always doing a great job of it, but you know, progress, not perfection, is that's right.
Speaker 2:I can only control me. Like it's the tail as old as time, like, dude, you can't I can't control my three-year-old you know, like, at the end of the day, he's going to do what he wants to do, and like reminding myself constantly that, like I'm going to do the best I can, I think everybody else is trying to do the best they can. I'm going to tell myself that because it's very, very easy to get for me to talk into a negative circle very quickly, and the more I do do it, it'll put me in a bad place. And so what I'm not saying is that there isn't a time and place and space to do so. But it's back again to that accountability piece. Like I did, I have my team thread, I have a lot of people I can reach out to right now and again it's that vulnerability and security thing. So, like I, I have my, I have my cutaway pillow or whatever you know, I got my backups right now, cause like I need it.
Speaker 2:I need it.
Speaker 1:Dude, you just mentioned something that so many veterans need to hear and it's that negative echo chamber Like, yes, we know that things aren't padding out the way we might want them. We might not like the way our current culture in the United States is, we might not like certain government elected officials, but at the end of the day, if you sit, especially in social media these if you sit in the and I'm not going to name names, but there are certain individuals that foment and create this constant negative feedback of just anger, anger, anger, anger. Be broken, be rally around PTSD diagnosis, be angry, be disgruntled. It's like why? None of it's going to help me, none of it's going to help you If we sit in that space. We're not going out there trying to create a nonprofit. We sit in that space. We're not trying to promote a positive message of healing and overcoming our issues. No, we're just sitting there bitching and complaining and commenting on the same things over and over and over again. And it doesn't.
Speaker 1:I know it intimately because it was very, very attractive at first. Yeah, let's fucking constantly feed into this At the end of the day, like you're a, at the end of the day, I got things to do. I got bills to pay, I got chores, I got things that I really want to do, and I don't have time to just be negative, but it's so attractive because there's that aspect of you're validating everything I'm saying. So, of course, I want to sit here in this chat room with you, or this Discord threat or on this social media channel, and it's like, dude, it takes a lot of guts to like walk away from it. It takes a lot of guts like sit there and be like I want something better, man, like I want to move on to your progress, going into not only trying to get an education, but you went back to like one of the hardest schools to get your MBA.
Speaker 1:Man, like we kind of glossed over that. I want to focus on that Cause. Like that's not an easy thing, dude. Like how did you make that decision? And and uh, like what drove you towards that avenue?
Speaker 2:So I did try to gloss over it because, like I, I don't know, you know, like I was just like, yeah, so I went to business school, oh, yeah, just warning.
Speaker 2:So when I was at 7th Group I think you know a lot of this, it's just in the military I was going to say special ops. A lot of it is luck and timing and with where I was in my year group and how it lined up there. I don't know if it's still around. There's a program that came out in 2015 called PBG SIP. It was performance-based grad school incentive program.
Speaker 2:So, when I I think there was like 19 branches in the army. Each branch gives up like two names RSOF is considered one of the branches because we have ca, psyops etc. And branch called me and said, hey, you're, you're the pbg zip guy, like. And I was like, oh shit, like I don't know about this so I was thinking about it.
Speaker 2:I was also like being told by the seven crew commander that I was going to be general brennan's aid and I did not want to do that. Like nothing against general brennan, like he's awesome, but like I didn't want to be a general's aid.
Speaker 2:That sounded horrible. I told him that, yeah, um, and so I immediately like took the gre, put a resume together, applied to wharton and I like got in, and one of the things I wrote about was I I mean, I wasn't joking, I wrote my paper on how I was going to be arrogant, damn, I was going to, I was going to be chairman of the joint chief of staff and that Wharton's tools was going to help me and I was going to take their name from when I did it. And like they're like this guy yeah, man, we're accepting. And then, and like they're like this guy yeah, man, we're accepted. And then, 2024, I met boy, but, um, I mean that, I mean, dude, I had, like I drank the kool-aid, I was in man, I loved it, and it was a year for me to like take a knee for two years and like spend family time and go to business school and covid popped off and you're not normally home and I'm home with a two-year-old and my wife is pregnant and again, like undiagnosed, untreated PTSD.
Speaker 2:You can imagine what this is like. She does not have a support system and that left and shortly after, like everything crumbled away. I'm in Philadelphia and you know, at a school where, like, it's not always a homogenous, you know, network, and like I tried, man, like I was even the best president, like I was like in it with my co-president you know my buddy Adam was the other co president Like I was trying and it you can't, I learned that the things that got me to where I am now are are not necessarily the things that are going to get me to the next level. And I didn't figure that out and I crashed and burned really hard because I was trying to do the same things and it wasn't working.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, it's, it's a huge load. I mean, business school is a whole different animal, um, and it'd be challenging, it'd be taking all that on while you're going through so much. It's.
Speaker 2:It's commendable, man, like it's white knuckling sobriety, that's what it might be. It might be commendable, but, like, in retrospect, like I think I caused myself a lot of pain that I could have avoided. Um, so, like you know, anybody suffering in silence, man like find a battle buddy, because I would not be here today if I didn't have some strong battle buddies that like kept bumping my compass and I'm very thankful for those individuals yeah, we, when it comes to peer support, we don't talk about it and we don't promote it enough.
Speaker 1:But, dude, just like any other military school, just like any other time in your service, you've leaned on your friends. You have to be able to do that. You have to look at the people on your left and your right and be vulnerable enough to say I need help. I just need a joke, I need to laugh, I need somebody to just check on me. We do it throughout. I mean, I remember having people you checked in on through an SUT like just friends. You lean on a little bit when things sucked. Then you do it in sniper school. You do it in free fall, but then when we get on the outside, we kind of forget about all the things that helped us. It's like, if you're listening and you're struggling, maybe you're not ready to talk to counselor, maybe you're not ready to fully divulge and be open and vulnerable with somebody, but at least reach out to your friend. Reach out to that one person that knows you or a family member. You can't deal with this. That's why the tagline of the show is we get through this together.
Speaker 1:None of us are meant to be by ourselves. We tend to think that way. We think we're all these freaking awesome soft professionals. We don't need anybody. Truth is, human beings thrive on connection and being able to talk. So if you're out there struggling, please just reach out to a friend through a text or a phone call. I'm telling you it'll help vet some of the things and when you're ready, that's like connective tissue to get you ready to talk to an individual Like I know. That's how it helped me, like when I first started, like finally understanding that the tremors were getting longer and louder. Like started venting to one friend and then two friends. We kept each other afloat for a little bit, but then eventually you need that professional care and by that time I was more than ready. And by the time I got to lower age, then it was like the floodgates were ready to open.
Speaker 2:I'm a man of analogies. Like the whole time you're talking I'm like, yeah, dude, like ranger school, like no one is pulling security by themselves, cause like you're going to sleep and even if, like battle buddy, you guys keep each other for for a little bit, but like you do need that professional helper, like a lot of us do. And I think a reminder I'd like for you know again, for the people listening, for everybody, like I think a lot of us like, well, I tried therapy, it didn't work. It's like all right. Like, yeah, it is like, pick your analogy. It's like picking a personal. You're not listening just like you would anything else. And so I highly encourage individuals try it. If it doesn't work, try somebody else.
Speaker 2:Because, like I've gone through I think I went through like seven therapists before I found the one I have now and I've been with her for two years, almost two years. It'll be two years this july and hell, yeah, we're, we're doing a lot of we're doing a lot it's I recently did, um, it was 10 weeks clinical trials, 10, 10, 90 minute sessions of the impact of killing and yeah, I mean it was. It was opened up a lot for me to talk about, which you know, like the stuff that we struggle with, the two things that can be true and, like you know, that's why I didn't. I didn't just read a book like this. All I came from, like you know, the last two years of therapy getting me to where, like I am today, that's the beauty of it.
Speaker 1:You're, we're, whether you want to admit it or not. Look, I used to be an 18 bravo. Before I became a warrant, I was an 18 Bravo, so I know all the dumb Bravo jokes. Every Green Beret within every Green Beret, there is somebody that wants to know more. You want to find information when you get on your journey towards mental health and getting better, start reading. Start reading about all the things that can help you. Like there are so many different modalities out there that if I didn't take an active participation in my own healing and my own journey, we'd never have known to ask for it. Like that's just the reality.
Speaker 1:All these things are things we can overcome, nothing. We shouldn't go into a mental health treatment center or to a professional and hear a diagnosis and think, oh my God, my life's over, this is going to be my identity forever. Like, no, it's not All these things. Anxiety, depression, ptsd these are all things that we can learn, understand and then combat and overcome. It takes work. It takes being dedicated and wanting to have a better life. Look, it's not going to be easy, but none of the greatest things in life are easy. It all comes with challenges, like being a dad.
Speaker 2:How hard is that I mean it's a constant like it's constant, but.
Speaker 1:But it's pretty freaking awesome, right it's so rewarding.
Speaker 2:It's both. Like it's both yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and that's mental health in a nutshell Like I'd rather wake up and I'd rather face these challenges and take and have to go do those long pauses and breathing exercises and having to go do mindfulness and having to realize that I need to step back and look at the complete picture than going back to living my life where I just think that I'm supposed to always be angry, bitter and broken. Fuck that we're supposed to be better, like in this, in this part of your life. Dan, I want to ask you, now that you have the tools, now that you have the resources, how does it feel to finally have, like that understanding that, okay, I'm not broken, I'm not like, I have answers, I can move forward?
Speaker 2:It gives me a fuck ton of hope Like hope. One word answer man Hope, hope, hope. Like cause. There's like when you literally talk about being at the bottom and you know that's something I try to tell people like dude, trauma is trauma and it's relative, like I understand, we can get, we can get on this, oh well, you know, like well, at the end of the day, like the worst day of your life was the worst day of your life and the worst day of my life, the worst day of my life and you can't change.
Speaker 2:That Like that is very important to understand. So for me, when, like, when I look at where I was and now that I understand a lot of things, I can give myself grace, I can forgive myself, which has allowed me to forgive other people, because for a long time it was me being so angry at myself and being angry at other people to where I'm able to cope with things a lot better. And so it's just that constant reminder of, of seeing the progress and it, it like it, it hope. It just gives it gives me hope. I feel like I can give others hope. And you know something I want to jump on before it like slips out of my brain, because you know how these things can just like when you're talking about other modalities, like very similar to what you're doing with your podcast, like that's what, uh, kevin and I are do with Renewed Heights is when we do get each other together, we can share about, like Stella Gangling Black Injections and like how helpful they can be for some people. For me, I'm one of the people that have benefited specifically from the Donovan and Banks Foundation, who has paid for me to get, and then I've told other people about it and I pushed them, so like we're sitting around after a skydive. And then we started learning about like MERT I forget what the acronym MERT stands for, but it pulls your brain with magnets. Well, my buddy Kevin is friends with people in Arizona, that and so like a lot of this. Just like you said, it's like well, I didn't even know that was a thing. Like okay, well, tom Satterly and Jen Satterly do the All Secure Foundation and you probably read the book, you know Arshile Ho. Like I recommend that book to my mom, my brother, my sister, my girlfriend.
Speaker 2:Like it is that education piece. And I think when other individuals hear guys like me and you talking about it and oh, what's this SGB thing? Or what's Donovan Bank Foundation? What is this book? Arsenal of Hope? What's All Secure Foundation? What's Laurel Ridge? It puts it out there.
Speaker 2:And so that's a lot of what I'm trying to do right now. Trying to do right now because, again, whatever the reason is, whatever I'm working through, I have a desperate need to put good energy out there. Doesn't matter why, it doesn't matter if I'm trying to like I'll do the bad shit, because I'm learning that, like when you do good stuff, it feels really good and like that's a good feeling and like you'll notice that like the more you do it, people will see it, the good energy you're putting out. I literally think that's why we're talking today like new night's head is raised, raised zero dollars. You know we're not there yet and like I'm on your podcast talking about like the things that are coming next, because I'm trying to put as much good energy out there and I know you are too so like Well, dan, I can tell you right now, this is and, like I said, this is an experiment that will, uh, will run, you know, for the rest of my life.
Speaker 1:That's it. Like I'm not walking away from this, this endeavor, this project. Um, but one thing I've realized by bringing individuals such as yourself when we go through the hardest, most challenging aspect of our lives and we come out of it better human being, a better man, the leader in the green beret within us doesn't just want to walk off. No, we're going to go back and we're going to get as many guys through this as possible. And that's the beauty of healing and being on the road to recovery and staying on that journey because you want to bring others back from the void. And that's where we get people to create nonprofits. We get people to create these amazing endeavors and they're not doing it because I want to be rich. No, we're doing it because the green beret inside of us know that it's important to go through and bring as many brothers back from the void. And that's the beauty of this. I've seen it.
Speaker 1:There's so many nonprofits that are kicking ass because it's one person was brave enough to stand up and say I'm going to get help and, through your endeavors and going into the unknown and finding that courage to, yeah, rescue yourself, because you can't do it for your wife, you can't do it for your kids, you can't do it for your best friends, at the end of the day, you have to go through this journey for yourself. You have to do it for you. That's the only way that you're going to really dig in and read like fucking address these issues. You want to do it for you because you know you deserve it and that's why your, your nonprofit, is going to make such awesome waves, because it's purpose driven, like understanding that from the very beginning it's like, oh shit, this man's gone through it and he knows how this can help someone. So let's dig into this before we run out of time. Man, renewed Heights how did this thing kick?
Speaker 2:off, I am in a men's group and we meet monthly and the beginning of the year we came up with a mantra and my mantra, just you know, I think, no more than three words. I was bouncing around, I came up with a mantra and my mantra, just you know, I think, no more than three words. And I was bouncing around I came up with like renewed heights ahead, and then I got put in touch with my now co-founder, kevin, who is a 18. Charlie, who got out from first group and became a professional skydiver and a Wharton friend, was like you two need to talk, like right now. And I just shared with him like hey, man, here's what I was thinking. He's like dude. This is what I was thinking Because, like you mentioned before, skydiving was so beneficial for me, getting into that point of being present to where, like dude, when that green light turns on and you jump out, I mean dude, I'm just I'm there and I was telling my aunt, who has been battling cancer for like 30 years and she goes that's what equestrian therapy was for me.
Speaker 2:I'm like, holy shit. Like Kevin, what do you think? Like Kevin has a full-time job. I'm a rigger. Like that is where I get my supplemental income on top of being retired, like I'm fortunate enough to where I have a pension and the way I live my life, I'm able to do this, where every single penny, all the proceeds, go directly to the nonprofit. Right now, and if we do eventually get to a point where, like, I need to pay an executive director, like we'll cross that bridge when we get there.
Speaker 2:And we started talking about like dude, we could get this, like getting people to get through their A license, like what if there's people that are already in the sport? Okay, like putting them through canopy courses, and it's well, like let's not just like revert, like reserve this for veterans. Why not open this to first responders? Because any skydivers out there you'll notice. I I feel that a lot of us all struggle with, like we have some type of trauma and our outlet is skydiving, so like there's already something there. So you start getting like first responders, veterans in this community. So now I want to go to skydive orange, which is my home drop zone just south of dc. Dude, I have like 10 vets I can be like hey, I'm gonna be there. And then, like they start hearing about what we're talking about now.
Speaker 2:We're talking about renewed heights. We're talking about Renewed Heights Ahead and it's like, oh man, this is dope and so it's community, which is super important. Yeah, that accountability piece, doing something that is healthy, a way, it's an escape, and you're doing it with a group of people, a conduit that allows you, like, there are people that I'm going to have come through Renewed Heights Ahead and discretion is super important to me. I put them in touch with Donovan and Banks for help because, like, I don't have the funds yet to put them through Renewed Heights Ahead and I'm working with my drop zone.
Speaker 2:So, like, if you do go to our websites, renewedheightsorg, the president of Skydive Orange, monica, is helping with the website for free. She's doing it pro bono because, like the last year, year and a half that I've been like doing extra, extra stuff, the drop zone, like to get to know people spend time, help out when I can. They're like dan, we would love to help out with what you're doing. Let's figure out a way. So, like I have that here as well, as my co president, former professional skydiver, lives in Arizona. I mean, skydive Arizona is like the Mecca and he yeah, yeah, it is.
Speaker 1:I went out there to visit my buddy, kevin, and like I.
Speaker 2:I barely knew. You know I'm new to the sport. I find out this guy, johnny gun, 18,000 jumps, recently retired pro skydiver. He zipped out to skydive uh arizona to do one jump with me. Didn't have time to pack his parachute left. I felt like the most special kid in the whole world. But this all was because of my buddy, kevin. And so, talking about this, throughout the sport, veterans, non-veterans, people like did you? You have to do this to the point where I don't want to spend too much time on how Fran Boudet and I became like friends, but he had recently reached out to me. He wanted to talk to my dad and I'm like all right, okay, like yeah, I'll go to my dad.
Speaker 2:This is like strange, but him and I have had a relationship where he heard about what happened to me. He heard about me going to lower Ridge and Fran Boudet for those of y'all who don't know you know three-star retired former USASOC commander and I asked him if he would be on the advisory board and he his bandwidth is about this big and he said he needed to talk to his wife about it and he said he said yes, and so I feel like maybe it's the passion behind my voice and like what, how I'm seeing this.
Speaker 2:But there's something here and there's a lot of people jumping on board and I have, you know, kind of had to put a pin in it right now this summer. Um, I am off, I'm not doing anything but being a full-time dad from may 26 to july 26 good there's nothing on the calendar. And then renewed heights ahead is going to pick up, with some wind behind us, and we're going to be pumping guys, you know guys and girls through.
Speaker 1:So um, absolutely it, it sure as hell will. And um, if you're listening right now, head on over to the episode description. I'll wait, I'll pause. Scroll down. You'll see the link right head on over to the episode description. I'll wait, I'll pause, scroll down, you'll see the link right there. Head on over there. Donate.
Speaker 1:Figure out how you can get involved, get out there and start living your life. The world doesn't start once you retire. The world's happening around you right now and one of the greatest things you can do while you're still in is figure out how you can help people who are of service to others, and that's why I always say try to get involved with a nonprofit If it's just donating a little bit of money on the side, or figure out how you can help with web design, with throwing out fundraisers. One of the greatest things about Instagram is people get behind these causes and they raise money doing the dumbest things with memes. So I know that the community's out there. So if you're a soft guy looking for a way to connect with a nonprofit that's from our community, hit up Dan, dan. How can people get ahold of you right now?
Speaker 2:So, if you go to our website renewedheightsorg that's probably the best way there's a contact us button and, like Denny said, if you want to just get back financially, obviously we would appreciate that, but I know that I'm not always in a place to be just throwing out money. So, if you're in the area or there's a way that you think you can help out, not only are we a nonprofit, but now that we have 501c3 status, if you want to give us your time and your time is, for an example, $10 an hour you can provide me with a bill and I provide you with an invoice. That's a taxable write-off and so, like that is something like you know me being a rigger, other riggers that are at the drop zone, people that are like, oh, I'm an AFF instructor, I'll give you my time and I'd say that. Or dan at renewed heightsorg, that is, that is my email. I don't know if you know if you want to drop that in there, but if you please take care. Like it is not a secret and you know there's going to be more to come.
Speaker 2:We like we have some, like some of the advisory board members. If you're a skydiver, kurt and genie bartholomew, they're, uh, two of our board members the most decorated canopy pilot of all time, kurt Johnny Gunn you know multiple world records. He's on our advisory board If you have things that you think could help. Like other organizations I know, jump for Valor is a skydiving nonprofit that mainly, as far as I know, they only do tandem for veterans that you know potentially can't jump. Word of mouth spread the word and I'd say that's the best way right now we are working on, you know.
Speaker 1:Facebook, instagram, linkedin and those will be out shortly. Oh yeah, man. Well, as soon as you get those channels up, let me know and I'll update this episode description with all those links and then I'll shoot you collaborations. And every time I release an episode I put it's a huge social media campaign. Try to rotate reels and stories of that episode for like at least three or four days. So if you're guys are listening and you're tired of seeing my stories, well then, share us with your friends. Remember, like, share and subscribe goes for us too, so send that to all your friends. That way, we can promote great nonprofits like Renewed Heights.
Speaker 1:Dan, thank you so much for being here. Thank you for being vulnerable enough to share your insight and your journey and, uh, I think we need an episode two man cause. I want to dive in some more in your personal. I don't think we ever touched in. Uh, you know how you became a green beret and I think that's perfect to like go all the way back. Uh, do a second part. Dan, again, please continue your mission and keep us informed.
Speaker 2:Man, cause, this is awesome, I would. It would be an absolute privilege to come back and be in your podcast. Um, it was right after Laurel Ridge. You know, I stayed along, you know, in contact with some of the guys from that tribe and, uh, somebody was like dude, you have to listen to this. This podcast specifically on operator syndrome and that is the first podcast I ever listened was from what operator syndrome was your podcast? And so that hell yeah, yes.
Speaker 2:When I texted you about it, somebody who was like, oh, like, listen to this podcast I was like I already know the podcast, Like already already knew about it, so um, we're growing to be back on here and do this again.
Speaker 1:Oh, yeah, yeah, dude, for sure, uh, and, and I'd like to close it off, like we close it off every morning and every evening at a lower ridge, with a loud and thunderous tribe. Uh, thank you so much for being here, man, to all you listening, thank you for tuning in and we'll see you all next time. So then, please take care of each other, especially the 18 bravos and the 18 office. They need the most help.
Speaker 1:If you like what we're doing and you're enjoying the show, don't forget to share us. Like us, subscribe and head on over to our patreon, where you can be part of our community and get access to all of our episodes as soon as they drop. And remember we get through this together. Take care, this together. Take care.
