From the visceral thrills of deployment to the grounding realities of family life, our latest episode captures the essence of military service and beyond. On this episode Deny sits down with Alex Aguilar, who shares his own tales of transition from the structured world of Ranger Regiment to the bustling demands of being a Fire Fighter. Together, Deny and Alex peel back the layers of what it means to wield responsibility in high-stakes environments, be it on foreign soil or a local emergency.
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From the visceral thrills of deployment to the grounding realities of family life, our latest episode captures the essence of military service and beyond. On this episode Deny sits down with Alex Aguilar, who shares his own tales of transition from the structured world of Ranger Regiment to the bustling demands of being a Fire Fighter. Together, Deny and Alex peel back the layers of what it means to wield responsibility in high-stakes environments, be it on foreign soil or a local emergency.
If you enjoy our content, sign up for our Patreon and get access to additional content, bonus episodes, and access each episode before they drop on Spotify or iTunes.
Instagram: alexaguilar_trm
STAN Store: https://stan.store/avaguilarTRM
We greatly appreciate you and your support, so please remember to LIKE, FOLLOW, SHARE, and SUBSCRIBE!
Patreon: patreon.com/securityhaltpodcast
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/securityhalt/
X : https://twitter.com/SecurityHalt
Tik Tok: https://www.tiktok.com/@security.halt.pod
Produced by Security Halt Media
It's crazy how little we valued our own life, thinking that we're just going to have this short life, we're going to live for deployments and then not going to worry about anything down the road. No, 100%.
Speaker 2:It's the whole in regimen. Your whole training cycle is built up to that deployment, at least during the GWOT. So it was like, okay, all I got to do is get through these six months of training and then I get to go on deployment and that's what I care about and I'll deal with everything else after deployment.
Speaker 1:Say with us that's like we live, like we actually feel like we're living our life while we're deployed, and then when we come back it's like, oh great, let's reset the clock, do these stupid fucking training missions. Go, do all these stupid fucking things we hate to do. Some things are cool, but man really can't wait for deployment.
Speaker 2:I know, right, I'm back home, I got to do this. The security online classes and I got to. You know, watch those like videos where it's like the computer, animated people and they're like, hey, do you need an ID card? Or something.
Speaker 1:You're like, oh my God, yes, dude, the online training, the master matrix tracker, like that's like, and we, we all saw it come and we all saw that like at some point in your career you're going to have to, like, mature, put on your dad pants and be the fucking guy in charge. And then you're in charge of all the mind numbing, stupid shit and you're like I'll never deal with that, I'll never have to deal with that admin shit. And then you do.
Speaker 1:Yeah, then you get your ass chewed for nobody doing their online training.
Speaker 2:I know, and I'm like, and I can't blame them because I didn't want to do my online training, like so it's just like guys, I know it sucks, just please do your online training.
Speaker 1:Dude, I have to ask you, man, that tell me, like what, what led you to go to Ranger Regiment? Did you always? Was it like a thing you grew up with or it's just like fuck it, I'm going to go with the hardest.
Speaker 2:So when I was in high school I wanted to join the military. And then it kind of came down to you know what, I'll give college a shot. Like I told my parents, like you know what, I'll give college a shot, try it. And I spent about a year and a half, two years dropping out and I was like, okay, this is, college is not for me. I basically just had fun and party the whole time and I was like all right, I'm not doing anything right now. I was like I think I will go back join the army, right?
Speaker 2:And it's funny, my stepdad's friend that worked with him, he was in the big army. So we went. He took me out one day and just told me about the military. And he was like if you're going to join, go in the Ranger Regiment. And I knew about the Ranger Regiment and what it was. And I was like, okay. And he's like trust me, man, you're going to get the best gear, the best missions, you're going to do all this stuff. He's like, basically, you're going to get to do everything a Navy SEAL does, but you don't have to swim. And I suck at swimming. To this day I'm still like everyone's like are you good swimmer and I'm like, I mean, I don't drown Like so.
Speaker 2:I was. The minute he said that, I was like oh, I'm sold, let's do it so. And this was, and I had gone. This was so I ended up leaving for basic in like April of 2011. So that when I had gone to basic, it was like about a year or two before they had switched over to the RAS program from the RIP program. You know where RIP was like we're just going to beat the shit out of you for four weeks, and then you're in the Ranger Regiment. And then RAS was like all right, we're still going to beat the shit out of you for four weeks, and then, if you can survive the four weeks, then the second four weeks will actually train you on some basic stuff so you actually can do something when you show up to your team, you know. So then I went and, yeah, I went to basic and airborne and RAS and all that stuff and in 2011, and ended up getting.
Speaker 2:I was supposed to go. I wanted to go to 275 because I was like, oh, it's a short trip on from Los Angeles. I'm like, oh, it's an easy trip, made some buddies in RAS and you're like, dude, just go to 175. And I was like we get our wish list and I'm like fuck it up at 175. I mean, most people are going to 275. And literally out of our class I think we started with like 153 and graduated 70. And it was like 10 dudes 175, 60 dudes 275.
Speaker 1:And I got 175.
Speaker 2:And I was like, oh, it's meant to be, you know. So that's, that's end up how I got to the regiment. And you know it's true. And they say, like getting there is the easy part, but staying is the hard part. Because you get there, you're a private and your life is terrible, absolutely awful, like you are just scum of the earth. You know what I mean.
Speaker 2:But but it's one of those things where, like, and then as you progress, you like look back and you realize like every single leader you had was in that same position at one point. You know it's just that right of passage. You go through, you know, and it's all, and it's honestly like it's funny because you're a private, you're scum piece of shit, like can't do anything right, but at the same time your leaders are basically just seeing if you can hang, see if you can be. You know, can you get through that resolve and actually stay with it, keep doing your job, keep doing this and just be trusted. Essentially, you know what I mean. Can you still? Can you just be trusted? Okay, cool.
Speaker 2:And then as you progress, you realize it's just part of that process Because at the end of the day you're still going to go out on target and then, when you get back, you're going to be treated like dog shit in the ready room. Treat like dog shit, you know it's just part of that process, though, but they basically are like hey, it's a right of passage, you do your time. You know what I mean. Can you have the resolve to stick with it? Suck it up, get through it? Yes, okay, good, then you know, then you're one of us.
Speaker 1:Yeah, absolutely. It's funny. I had a friend when I decided to go to selection. It was right after an Iraq deployment and back then it was like the year long trips where it's like say goodbye to your life, say goodbye to everything you know, and we're just going to throw you in the desert for a year. And you come back and you're like, after experiencing combat with the 82nd and having you know some really good leaders and some really pissed poor leaders, it's that you know you do that for a year and you're like, okay, I'm going to go over to this side.
Speaker 1:I see these green Berets are fucking crushing it and everybody's a solid dude and they treat you better Like fuck this and a lot of us. It was like a mass exodus. Like like the first guy that went was like Moses. Everybody just went and followed him. And once you make it there, you're like all right, I fucking made it and it's just the same thing. It's like you have to show up and then you're right back at the very bottom and you're a brand new fucking dude.
Speaker 2:The FNG dude every time.
Speaker 1:Yeah, congratulations to make the Q-Course. Get your ass in there and scrub the toilets. It's like all right, yep, right.
Speaker 2:And it's funny because I went through, I was like 22 when I went to your ass, when I was like you know, and I'm thinking like, oh my God, like I'm 22 years old and I'm 22 years old and I'm in here.
Speaker 2:But even though you think, like in the real world, you're like you know, I'm 18, I'm 22, I'm a man, I know what I'm doing. And then you get to the military and my actually my first squad leader was maybe 11 months older than I was and he was already E5 with like five deployments, and I was a 22, 23 year old private and he's like, well, he's one of the squared away fucking best leaders that I've met my entire life. And it was like it was crazy to me how I was like dude, we are almost the same age and this dude has probably lived a thousand more lives than I have at this point and like the things he's done and seen and where he at in his life and maturity level is so beyond where I am because I wanted to party and go to college and, you know, be young and fun and he was like, no, I'm, I'm doing this right at 17. And that's it. So it was funny, we were like the same age but he was light years ahead of life.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, I ran in the same situation because you you expect everybody to like have the same baseline. You're like, okay, like I come, you know I'm not coming off the street. I'm not somebody that hasn't been in the military, I've been 82nd, I've had some life experience. But then you meet some individuals that have been there since they were like they went selection early to like as soon as they fucking could, they got their private experience and conventional army and they fucking jettisoned that. And then you see them as like oh, this whole caliber motherfucker, it is a whole different beast. This is just been fucking crushing life professionally.
Speaker 1:And it's also like the understanding of like okay, this is different, this is a profession. This isn't just guys on the summer or like two year pump, this is a career. That's a lifestyle and it sometimes gets us in trouble because you don't have a lot of different outlets to get out of the stress you're going through. But you see these guys and you're like you start seeing and it's like, okay, superheroes are fucking real, these guys are fucking legit because. And then you pick up those behaviors like hey, I'm living for this fucking deployment, like, don't fuck up my training, don't do anything to fuck up this team's fucking projected deployment and looking good on the boards because you better be square the fuck away, because you're part of this element, like we're fucking going to go to the best mission, we're going to get the best fucking training.
Speaker 1:You better fucking keep up. And it's just like, okay, that's how, that's how you make great dudes. You treat them like shit, put them in a pressure cooker and then they look forward to going to hell. They look forward, right.
Speaker 2:That's what we love. I love about the regiment is we're like one of the only special operation units that has a release for standard. That if you don't make the standard and we build the paperwork, you're kicked the fuck out. You don't pass ranger school because of like, uh, whether you know medical, you can go retry again, but you know you, you go back, you get tried and you just can't pass. Like I don't care how good of a dude you are, sorry, dude, you did, that's the standard. You don't meet it, you're out. And that's that's one of the things I love about battalion is like if you don't meet the standard we had like two or three privates in the time I was there in my platoon that like we're, like you're out, dude, you can't hang, I'm sorry, nice try.
Speaker 1:And even there's, there's, there's, there's all the stories from a lot of friends that had that came from regiment, where it's like you fuck up that much, just that fucking much, or innocent circumstances, but still it's like, hey, motherfucker, sorry, sorry, but not sorry. And they get like the worst story I heard and it's like I foreheads a piece of shit Like I don't know. But he was out there. But like just hearing this individual I've shared his story a little bit before but like the moment he found out, it was like being torn apart from a family and then they're like you're going to forehead and it just like my life was over. They sent me the hell and I had to claw my way back. He did everything he could to go to selection, to get selected, get out of there, to get back into a place where there were standards, where there was a greater calling Cause. Hey, the military is not the same, like I hate to say it. It seems horrible.
Speaker 1:It's not the same experience everywhere you go. I've seen places where it's like a nine to five, where people aren't held to a center, where people don't like have that spirit of like I'm off service and I'm doing something of great importance and it's just like fuck, like this feels like Not even National Guard of Reserves, this feels like you're working at a shift place. Yeah, 100%.
Speaker 2:It's not like when you go to a school that has like big army and special operates together, like your BL. I think it's now.
Speaker 1:BLC the.
Speaker 2:UCWC and SLC and you're literally be like what the fuck? Like this is not okay. Like you're in the military, this is not okay. You have like I'm sorry but not sorry. It's like there's no reason. You're in the military, you need to be taped. You can't pass a PT test, you can't do that Like you have to ask. You can't write an essay, like you can't give a brief of any kind and I'm like you know, without spell check, without this, and that stuff will drive me wild.
Speaker 2:And I don't know if it's just from the way I was raised, or battalion where, like little, tiny things that are easily correctable are what piss me off the most. When people don't do them, like if it's a major mistake and you learn from it, it's like dude, shit happens, I get it. But if it's like an easily correct you didn't proofread your presentation, you didn't do like that kind of stuff drive me up a wall because that's an effort issue, that's not a tactical. We tried something that didn't work. Failure, that's just a lack of effort issue and that's what drives me. It still does to this day.
Speaker 1:It's like oh man, you walked right into one of the things we're gonna talk about. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome Alex Aguilar to the podcast.
Speaker 1:Alex, I found you on social media and what I wanted to do with this season is talk more about mentorship, our transition, successes, failures and being able to share our authentic stories and how we navigate it the difficult, the good and the indifferent for the next guys coming out the bat. And what you just talked about is something that's important because when we get out in the civilian world, a lot of people think that's like, oh, I can leave all that stuff behind. No, that attention to detail, that small attention to detail that you cultivated, that I cultivated, that all of our brothers cultivated, and doing the layouts, doing the PCCs, pcis when we get out in the civilian world, people don't value that, we don't see that and it's like, okay, now I can mentor somebody in the small things. The small fucking things matter. And when people, when you see it happen around you, it stands and it's like, oh wait, like they had attention to detail, like being proud of what you do, being proud of your work, I see that's a diminishing light, it's going away in the world, man.
Speaker 2:It is and it'll be like even in the fire service or something that'll be on a scene and be like oh, we're all out of this. And it's like what did we check this morning? No, what in the hell did you expect? What the fuck it's like you know what's the old saying?
Speaker 1:What's that?
Speaker 2:old saying. They say like you can't expect what you don't inspect. So, it's like oh, you know, I just assumed it'd be in there. Well, it's not, you know.
Speaker 1:Except you can't make them do fucking burpees and make them run.
Speaker 2:There's a corrective action like that. There's none of that, you know. And then you know unfortunately it was like talking about like in the corporate world, some of us you can't tell someone to, you know beat their fucking face to the floor. They'd be like. They'd be like, oh, what they're like. Look at you like you're crazy and you're going to HR. You know, like.
Speaker 2:So the hard thing, I think, for military guys especially, like if they transition and they take a leadership role in some organization, is how do they motivate their team, having to use different tactics than they use in the military. You know what I mean. You have to change your verbiage. You have to change your physical, your tone, your physicality. All that stuff has to be applied differently. Because you know, we're in the military, we're so used to like you're a hard charger, I'm knife handing and I'm telling like this is it, Then that's it, and people are cool with that, like you know. But you get out to the real world and you can't do that. People get offended, their feelings get hurt, this and that, and as much as we want to complain of like you know, society needs to just harden up. They're soft and this and that at the same time, as a good leader. We have to just recognize that's the way it is, adapt our training style to that to still get the most out of a team.
Speaker 1:You know, no matter what organization you go to. Yeah, then we're not gonna walk into an office, a corporate setting or a first responder job, EMS, whatever you go into, you're not gonna walk in there. It's not gonna be a Ranger platoon or a fucking ODA. That's just not it. That's not the reality. That doesn't mean that you can't take the things, the wisdom you learn and figure out how you can apply it to everybody, Because, man, like we make great leaders and we're great assets.
Speaker 1:Individuals and people are figuring it out and they're head hunting and marketing specifically for guys like us, and it's like you can miss out on an opportunity if you don't realize that you have to shift, that you can't walk in like you said. You can't just be like beat your fucking face, dude, like you look sloppy, get down, do some butchers. Yeah, exactly, you can't do that anymore.
Speaker 2:You know, and one of the lessons I try and like when we had recruits in our fire academy and stuff like that and I'm teaching them is I always refer to them and refer back to when I was in the Ranger regiment. What made the Rangers so much better than the big army is? The end of the day, the mission was the same. It's still battle drill. Six battle drill, one outfit it doesn't matter, it's still the same battle drill, but in the regiment we're just masters of the fundamentals so we can execute quicker and smoother doing the exact same thing and it makes us more efficient.
Speaker 2:So if I relay that to the guys, you know we're doing drills on getting people out of windows, getting people, all that. And I said we can become masters of the fundamentals, we're gonna be good at our jobs. And if we're you know we're if we're gonna be masters of the fundamentals, we're gonna be smooth. If we're smooth, we're fast and we're fast we'll save lives and it all goes hand in hand. But if we just try and gloss over and do it fancy and rush through, we're gonna, it's not gonna work. Do the small little things correct every time and that'll create big incremental steps in your process, you know.
Speaker 1:And I wanna ask you, when you decided it was your time to go, what was that experience? What was your transition like?
Speaker 2:So when I joined, it was like, all right, there are things I wanna get out of this and things I wanna do. You know, I wanted to deploy, I wanted to, you know, my first team leader. I get to the regiment and he asked like, okay, why'd you join the army? You know, I wanted to serve my country, I wanna be a part of something. And he said, but why do you wanna be in the regiment? Like what? And I was like let's be completely honest, I just figured this was probably gonna be my best position to actually shoot someone in the face. I was like I'm gonna be a squad leader, you know. And he laughed. He's like all right, fair enough, I'm good with that, you know.
Speaker 2:So I got it looking back when it was time, when I was talking with my wife, and it was like my second enlistment was up. So I was just at I was at six years and I was like, okay, if I stay, it was like, hey, stay. They were like what are you gonna do? Are you gonna stay and be a squad leader? You get now. And I was like I need to think about, you know, and I really came down to at that point I had actually done everything that I had wanted to accomplish. You know, I had set out everything I was set out to do I had done.
Speaker 2:And I looked back and I was like do I feel proud enough and accomplished enough that, like, I can put this chapter okay, that's a great chapter and it's time to move on to experience new things and do new things? And the answer was that I was just comfortable to say it's okay to go and that I'm good. And that's when I was like all right, I'm gonna go on and I'm gonna do something else. And that was it was really just feeling asking myself, you know, did I do what I set out to do? Did I get what I wanted out of this? You know what I mean? Did I get what I wanted out of it, you know? And if the answer was like well, there's still some more, then it's, then you gotta re-enlist and keep going, right. But for me it was like okay, I think I got what I wanted out of this. I'm satisfied, I'm proud of the things I did, I'm proud of the accomplishments and the memories, the friendships, the hardships, all this stuff I can look back fondly on. All right, I think it's time.
Speaker 1:That's a fucking amazing message, because I think there are so many individuals that get into this phase of their life after a couple years they've done two enlistments and they Don't reassess, they don't start asking the hard questions. What I want to do, it's an easy ticket to just stay. I'm already good at this, is already autopilot. I just got to continue to do it. But then they turn bitter, then they start hating what they they're doing and it's now. You're no longer a positive force within your squad platoon, your company. Now you're that guy. You're just there for a fucking paycheck and you lack the fucking intestinal fortitude to stop and say Maybe I can take a chance and do something I'm more passionate about.
Speaker 1:I ran into people like that Conventional army a lot more than an SF, but within SF there's still people like that. It's like, hey, if you're not happy, take a gamble, look at. Look at what you want to accomplish, make that list and then take a bold, daring leap of faith into the unknown, because now you're a detriment to the fucking team. You're just that bitter, angry dude that doesn't want to be here. Then get the fuck out If you're much better on the outside. Like it doesn't have to be 20, 30, 40 years. You can do six years and realize I did fucking everything I wanted to. I saw the world. I have benefits. Now I can go do the things that I want to do. I don't know what it is, but I'm gonna be brave enough to go out there and that's an important fucking message to you. Not every fucking military career needs to be 30, 40 fucking years.
Speaker 2:Right, I think it needs to be. You know it's individual and what you get out of it. And I'd be a miss remiss if I didn't mention when I'm thinking, my first sergeant called me into his office and told me he said hey, I know guys who got out at four years and they still wear their soloments and they're crying and then they're still, they want to be ranger and they got out too early, all that he's like. So make sure if you are getting out and this for anyone you know yeah, you're not gonna still go play like you're still in the whole time, because then that means it was too early and you're gonna end up end up regretting it. So make sure you know when you're out, you're out. You know what I mean.
Speaker 2:So that was a big conversation as well. And it's true. You know you see a lot of people it's like you, you're out, but you're not out, you know yeah. So it's kind of want, you want your cake and eat it too. I want the benefits of being in and the brotherhood and this and that, but I don't actually want to be him anymore.
Speaker 1:So it takes. It take like exactly what you said. It takes that little bit of time to reflect, which is Is a lost art. People don't want to stop and be present in the moment and take account of what they've done, sit down, reflect and think Did I do everything I wanted to do? Did I go to all the places? Can I, can I've gone, become first-armed? Is that something I want to do? Nope, I don't want to do that shit. I don't want to do the admin shit. I don't want to do any of the fucking personal management shit. I did all the adventure stuff. I got the great, fucking awesome memories. It's time to fucking go. I'm gonna go, be willing to do that. I think right now is a perfect time for For this message, because there's a lot of individuals that aren't certain about the military that they're in, because it's Drastically different than military they came into it is yeah, especially if you came in in the, you know, middle of the GWAT and now it's so hit or miss or in a minute.
Speaker 2:You know what I mean. So we have a guy on my last deployment he was a private in another company, but we were on the same bird flying overseas and he's like dude, I'm gonna write a book and it's gonna be called how I miss the war and I'm like dying and you know it's just, you know it's yeah you know you don't get it, for you know it's not up to us on the ground. You know how long we're doing what you're aware, you know dudes.
Speaker 1:It's not. We don't control it. Experiences may vary. I had the same thing. A dude showed up to the team like Right after we got back from our last deployment in 2020. He's man, I can't wait to Afghanistan. I'm like bro, you ain't going to.
Speaker 2:Afghanistan. What do you mean, chief? I'm like that should.
Speaker 1:Few months later, at the fall of Afghanistan, I'm like, yeah, man.
Speaker 2:That's brutal. Yeah, exactly, and you know I was lucky enough that the way it worked out. I was in like the line company and then I was in the recce for two years back in the line.
Speaker 1:I'm more.
Speaker 2:So I actually caught a deployment every single training cycle so I was there for six and I did six full deployments and the other, like my original platoon, ended up when they started downsizing, ended up when I'm in the recce, missed out on deployment. So I actually caught a flip. I had stayed in that for the whole time. I would have, I would have missed to. That really were like profound and I had amazing experiences on doing that whole Recky thing and experiencing so much more of like more of a Jsoc thing than just the regiment and being like holy cow.
Speaker 2:There's a lot to this that you don't see, you know. But but it was for, like, that goes back to looking back on. Did you get everything you wanted out of it? And I was like, dude, I was lucky enough, I got six deployments in six years because, you know, in the Ranger regiment we just would rotate first bat, second bat, third bat, so you'd be like four months, four months gone, eight months home, four months gone, eight months, so you just rotate three, like that. And I was like I was, I was one of the lucky few to get six, and six at that time, from 2011 to 2017, you know. So I was that just lend again, thinking I was like all right, I got lucky on that, I got everything I wanted to do, you know, and it just lend back to that credo of all right, I'm proud of this, I'm. That was a good time.
Speaker 1:Yeah. So those deployments, like a lot of people don't realize, like, unless you have friends in Ranger regiment, it's not, it's the pace is brutal, man, the pace is fucking brutal. If you, how, if you don't mind me asking how old are you? I'm 34, 34 if you put it. If you put another 34 year old, they're gonna look so much younger.
Speaker 2:So no, you see, you see that old photo from that guy from World War two and he's like a 17 year old kid in 1918, four years later, and he looks like he's 40. Yeah, and it just talks about. It's true, you know all that war and just the. But even now in the G it's not the same type of war, but just the pace. You know the toll you're putting on your body, the mental toll, the emotional toll. Sometimes it does add up, you know. I mean it takes a lot out of guys.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's not an easy life. It's fun, it's adventurous, but there's a lot of TBI and a lot of cartilage missing in every one of us.
Speaker 2:Oh, yeah, yeah, I'm looking at my second shoulder surgery this year. Oh, you know, knees back, all that's that in it, but it's again. It goes back to like those. You think about those guys when they're older and they have a lot of them injuries from playing football In the NFL and they're like would you ever trade it in? They're like not a minute of it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, no same thing.
Speaker 2:You know they're like oh, your body is broken down. Don't you wish you'd I'd be like that wouldn't have done anything different.
Speaker 1:True, nick. There's, there's, there's a lot of emerging science, and and stem cells are proven to be great stuff, so just gonna wait till the VA authorizes that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, exactly in 30 years.
Speaker 1:It's more like 50. So how'd you get to being in a fireman? How'd you? You accomplished one thing that every boy that's raised outdoors wants to do that's be a fucking pipe hitting ranger and then firemen.
Speaker 2:So yes, so I got out and I ended up. I contracted for three years. The two different programs Started off on. One went to a selection for the another one that was a really high-end one Did that. One may still talk to those guys good friends with those guys.
Speaker 2:I had a lot of, had a lot of good times, but at the end of the day, even contracting, I was gone more than I was in the rendure management. That was six, seven months a year, complete deployment, not like training. Working home every night is complete deployment. Six, seven months a year. You know, two on two off, three on two off, whatever it was. And then it was finally like that's it. This is me, my wife, my wife's like I can't do this. You know we can't do this anymore.
Speaker 2:And so 2020, I took completely off, which just happened to be when COVID was going on, and luckily I had savings from contracting. So we ended up that year. I just was, spent the whole year with my family, took the whole year off, didn't do anything and just to spend every day with my Family hanging out. And it was absolutely wonderful and a local to fire department was hiring and I'd always want to be a firefighter in general. When I was overseas contracting, I got my degree in fire science. So I was like, alright, you know what? That's why I applied. They ended up calling me back like, yeah, you want to work here. And I was like, let's do it. So Now I've been doing that since November of 2020, and it was one of those things, too, when I was younger. It was I want to be a fireman. Also, you know, I want to be in the army, I want to be a fireman, I want to be a movie star. So far, on two out of three, so I still got time for the third one. We'll see.
Speaker 2:But so yeah, and then. So I started working there and what I've really discovered about the fire department that is so much different than being in the regiment is it's defensive, it's not offensive, you know what I mean. Like you're not going out, we're doing this, we're doing this. It's like someone else is having an emergency, you're gonna go help these other people. You're not actively like planning a target, planning a hit, like hey, we know we're going to be doing something at this time. You know and that was a big adjustment is that there's a couple guys who were in the regiment that work in my department and we're all close and everything. We're all in 175. Oh, no shit.
Speaker 2:And we all talk and you know the big thing the one guy said he had worked there before me is like you know, you have to remember, as a fireman, like this isn't your emergency, dude. He's like that's the number one thing is people get so worked up on like a fire scene, a car accident, extrication or, you know, cpr, because their family members are watching and you want to like do all this, and he's like, don't do any of that, just stay cut, it's not your emergency, just stay calm and do the fundamentals the way you're shown. You know, and that's a big thing.
Speaker 2:I think for all guys who are in the military and looking to go be a fireman, the big adjustment is that it's defensive. You know it's not your issue, it's not your target, you know it's someone else's emergency. You didn't have a car accident. You didn't have a family member go down in the living room and needing CPR. Your house isn't on fire. This is someone else's emergency. So there's no reason that you should be all worked up and like crazy, yeah, you'll have adrenaline and stuff. But there's no reason that you have to like really get you know over and thrall with it. You just do the job you've been taught to do and you'll be good at it. You know, and in the but it's definitely an adjustment as far as you don't know when you're going to do something.
Speaker 2:There are some days like I don't see the station because we're just running calls all day, and there are other days that all we do is eat, work out and sleep, and that's it. You know which is basically it's kind of like deployment, like if you're not hitting the target, you're just working out and sleeping, watching movies like family time.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we got weathered in man. Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 2:So you know it's give or take like that. But there's still a big thing Like so for my department this kind of ties in the military week we don't get a huge ton of fire because it's more of a suburban area. So we get a lot more accidents with extrications, a lot of medical calls like car fire, things like that. But I tell guys I'm like, but we still train to a standard, right, because you never know when it's going to happen. And I trace back to if you're in the military, everyone wants a CIB, everyone wants their CIB there. That means I did my job, I did this.
Speaker 2:I would tell my privates I'd be like, dude, I'm more concerned with you getting your EIB, because then that means you're an expert at your job. You know to do your CIB. That's not up to you. You may never get shot at. That's not up to you, that's up to the enemy, right. So that's and I tell guide, the same thing with firefighting now is that's not up to us, that's up to whatever happens out there. But we should still be focused on getting our EIB. As firemen. You know what I mean, being experts at our job. First and foremost. You can't control when you're overseas. You can't control if you take contact or not A firefighter. You can't control if you get a call for a fire or you don't. That's not up to you. So but you should always be prepared to and be an expert at the fundamentals and be an expert at your job.
Speaker 2:So, I know some of the privates would be upset, be like other guys, rubbing in their face like I got a CIB, I don't, and I'd be like dude, just, I care more about your. If they're on my team, that's how I tell them when I would tell them I care more about your EIB that knows you are an expert at your job and be proud of that CIB. You may never get it. You may. It's not up to you, bro, don't be, don't be, don't. You can't control it. Don't be upset about someone else not doing something for you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that was the hardest thing to try to explain them to younger guys especially. Like, hey, you have a guy that just spent a year or a year plus or an 18 Delta that's worked his balls off to get to that team, yeah, and they want to deploy and the first thing they meet is a salty old ass, broken ass, motherfucker. That's like hey, calm the fuck down, like you can't control that shit. And if you're that guy wishing and hoping and praying and doing all that shit, you're going to feel really shitty when you get one of those situations and a lot of people get fucked up and you walk away. You have that CIB because you just kept praying and hoping for it.
Speaker 1:No, prepare yourself, be the best at your fucking job, and then, if that situation presents itself, you're going to fucking do everything the best of your abilities. Don't go fucking wishing and praying for something that's fucking, that never leads you down a road that you want to be in, like you want to be able to do your job. That's where you should put your fucking focus on being able to do your job. And it's every single time I had those, those young individuals. It's like dude, how do I get it through your thick skull. Just focus on doing your job, yeah that's it.
Speaker 2:You're going to the controls. You know you can only control what you can control. If it's out of your control, then I don't waste energy on it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that is such an important thing to learn as a young man, but it's hard to teach a young man. That is so fucking gun hoe.
Speaker 2:Right, and especially if they're in a special operations thing, I mean they've worked their ass off to get in there. So they're you know they're pulling. They're you know people, they're charging at the bit, you know, trying to do whatever it's like you're raiding them in the view like all right, bud, just calm it down a little bit. We got this, you know. But I but I know exactly what they felt like because I felt the same way. You know you're on that first deployment, that first target. You're like we are pumped up, you're excited. This is now. Remember I did my very first target ever in Canada Canada, our bastion area, and we go in, didn't take contact at all and I was like what the fuck is this?
Speaker 1:We got to do a technical call out, though my team leaders like say Aguilar, what do you?
Speaker 2:what do you see? What do you think? And I'm like it's a lot of kneeling down. But, like you know, we're on like a BP and stuff. So I'm like what the hell is this? And he's like yeah, he's like that's how it is, man, you never know. He's like you just be prepared, bro.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:But you know, and I'm, but I'm 22, I'm like I'm army ranger, deployment this, and I'm like what the hell he's supposed to be? Like jumping out of birds and shooting from the hip and all this stuff.
Speaker 1:You know it's the weirdest thing to try to explain somebody. The mission briefs, intel brief, everything's amping you up. The rehearsals is amping you up. Nighttime comes in. Your fucking infill platform shows up. You're like, oh fuck, this is going to. It's literally like a Hollywood movie. It is like oh fuck, and you're flying, and there's, there's the briefs are running in your head. Oh, they have capabilities of shooting our fucking birds. Yeah, it never fails that first, first deployment for a new green beret and the fucking crew chief does a test Test fire.
Speaker 1:They're like fuck, come on.
Speaker 2:Literally every, every single time, even when I'm a team leader. At the point I'm like getting on it Instantly. I'm like, oh, we got 30 minutes, I'm taking a nap. And then the test fire. I'm like, oh okay, we're good, we're good, it's just a test fire, I'm going back to sleep till I get that 10 minute call.
Speaker 1:And then it's, and then again. As soon as you fucking start coming on, you're like oh, fucking fucking ramp comes down, fucking coming in low. Oh, here we go, fucking everybody goes out, birds leaving your movements God, we're going to get into contact for sure. Fucking support by fire gets put in the first fucking assault cell moves. And you're like oh fuck, this is about to go left. 40 minutes later, Exactly.
Speaker 2:But it's like hey, yeah, they're like, hey, we got him, we got everything. Successful mission. I'm like we didn't do anything. And they're like we talked about, we got the guy we came for, we got all the intel, we got them. Like, oh, I mean, I got that. That is a win.
Speaker 1:You know, fuck, but the one time, the one fucking time you're not amped up, that's the fucking time you're taking RPGs on infill, yeah that's literally exactly how it goes.
Speaker 2:It's just funny though, but it's funny describing the people and telling them like, on a mission, to be like you ever sees a hundred and five of them be like all right, you might do. You're rotating with this other platoon, so you do 50 target hits yourself. I was like dude, you're just doing them like I don't know. You might take contact four or five times out of 50. You're like what? And I'm like and even on those ones you might not even be in it, it might be the squad over there, like you know, on containment, and they, you know, drop two dudes at the courtyard and that's it, it's over. You're like, you know, so it's like you were. You might not be on a, you might not even be involved in it, but you know yeah, it's, it's.
Speaker 1:It's hard to explain to civilian friends because you know they see Hollywood, they see everything that gets pumped through movies and TV shows, but the reality is it's just like any other dangerous fucking job and the reality is it's just a lot of preparation and a lot of focus and you're going there and then you ride back and you're like, okay, that's good, but if you don't have the focus, if you don't have the termination, if you don't have the fucking principles and that tight function as a well oiled machine when shit hits the fan, you're going to fucking falter and everything is going to fall the fuck apart. So it's, it's good to have that constant feeling of, okay, this is it, you're going to do our fucking job. It's like, hey, that's a reality, because you never want to be that team that shows up to fucking Friday night fucking football and you're eight to fuck up and just get fucking thrashed.
Speaker 2:You know and it's, it's even beyond, like you know, those targets. But just lessons from that in life is and you know, you say you get built up, all right, my good I'm getting, and nothing happens. But if you really reflect and ask yourself like, okay, honestly, if something did happen, how do I feel about where I was? Was I comfortable with my position? Do I feel like I was prepared enough to do what I had to do? And you know, I don't care if you're in the regiment, you're in the corporate world, firefighting, police officer, a dog trainer, whatever it is, you know what I mean Was I prepared that if I had to do something, could I have done it successfully, effectively, quickly, safely? The answer is yes and I'm like, all right, then I can trust my training and I can trust what I'm doing and I can keep it going. The answer was no, then I have to reflect Was it the training?
Speaker 2:Was it you know, my own lack of preparation? Did I not personally invest enough into this training to feel it way? Or, you know, was there a lack of investment on the other end of me? You know and really get honest with yourself about what the shortcoming was, so that in the future then you build off of that and then you are ready to go, no matter what it is.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's absolutely correct, man, 100%. Now, in this phase in your life, now that you've, there's one thing that we suck at, especially if we're we get married young, have kids when we're young, we suck at being the present father, the present husband. Now that you've had this second chapter, how have you do, how have you been able to devote more time and be of greater focus in those areas in your life, and how?
Speaker 2:do you do it so a big thing? I mean, there have been several times my wife has been like I mean you're home but you're not home, you know, and even as a firefighter sometimes, you know I'll eat, I'll eat up over time and I'll forget that, like I have to be home more than I'm gone. And it comes to remembering that that how, like, when I'm home now, and what I really focus on is that the fact that my oldest son is now 10. So I'm like, okay, I have eight years left. So before and you know there's a red statistic it talks about after your kid turns 18, you have a cumulative like two to five years that you're going to spend with them for the rest of their life. When you add up like the days they're at your house or the nights that they're home from college or whatever it is, you have like two to five years that you're going to spend with them after they turn 18. And I was like so I have essentially, you know, maybe 13 years left to spend with my oldest son for the rest of my life, and that's a big where I was like I don't want to no longer like waste any of that time. You know it's so.
Speaker 2:Life to me now is I'm realizing like the things that I used to value, like I always value my family and being a husband, being a father, of course, but what I really cared about was adrenaline, living on the edge, feeling like I'm, I'm serving, I'm doing this, you know, and my wife is like, hey, you're doing all these things but you don't show up at for me and the kids, so what the hell's the point? Like to the outside world, I was, you know, army Ranger, firefighter, contractor, all this badass shit, and at home I'm lazy, not showing up, you know. I mean, it's one of those things where I'm neglecting my household duties because I feel like I've already Earned it in my work of, like my wife's like let's spend the weekend outside, and I'm like I was just in the woods for a week.
Speaker 2:I don't want to fucking be outside, yeah they weren't you know, but they weren't in the woods, they weren't doing that. That was my Responsibility and it's really when you're a dad and a husband, you take on a debt that you can't pay back. Your, your family is not. Whatever you do to work, that's an addition to when you get home. You don't get to come home and turn it off, and it's just part of being a man is that when you come home, you have to stay on because now you have to help your wife. She's been home with the kids or she's been at work, you know I mean your kids need help with homework. The house needs still needs, dishes still have to be clean, the yard has to be mowed, dog poop picked up All that stuff still has to be done. Just because you worked your ass off Doesn't mean you get to turn it off at home. If anything, it needs to be turned up even higher, because these are the people you're working for and this is my mind now. My mindset changed of like I. At the end of the day, I'm very I want to be liked and people very proud of the effort I put in at the fire service and work. Whatever it is, but the real, you know fans, and the real value I want is my family to know to, to be thankful for my presence, thankful that I'm home and willing to ask me for help. You know and know that they can come to me and that I'm a sturdy presence. And it's really taken a lot of years. Me, my wife, had to work through a lot of stuff and counseling the whole nine yards Because I mean it's tough. You know that lifestyle and all those things and it forget. It takes a toll on our significant others and our families, you know, and a contracting I was with a guy contracting. This son was 18 and he said he had a conversation with this kid and his kid was like Dude, I don't even fucking know you, and that was like he's. And he was like so he's like, but it's too late for me. He's like I just tell the young guys man, make some, do it for a little bit and get out. You know the contracting world at least. But he said his son was leaving for college and told him that to his dad I don't even fucking know you and that was like my worst fear and I was like I don't want that at all. I want my son to be my best friend, the way my dad is my best friend now. You know, yeah, and so it's.
Speaker 2:The big thing is it doesn't get to turn off when you're home. No matter what you're doing, you come home from a deployment. If you're working at nine to five fire, you know 24-hour ship at the fire station, you don't get to turn it off. You got to help out at the house, you got to be present, you got to. You know, ask your wife what do you need, hey, what do you need for me? You know to your kids, like, hey, I'd let spend time with them, do all that stuff, and it was a big thing is just For me recognizing that they don't care how tired I am or how much work I put into the fire station. They weren't there.
Speaker 2:Yeah they don't care if I ran ten calls and didn't sleep all night. That's not their life. Their life is the home life with me. So that's the life that they are gonna remember, you know. So it's, except it's accentuating. That is like, okay, when I'm home, I'm home, that's it, a hundred percent. I can, I don't you know work emails. I'll check them once a day or something. You know what I mean. Stuff like that. When I'm home, I'm home, and that's it. And that's a big thing. And I still struggle with it sometimes because I Want to be a hard charger and I want to do all this stuff that doesn't just get turned off.
Speaker 2:But it's kind of like I can turn the volume down.
Speaker 1:You know I'm fucking loopy and that's a thing. People tend to think that oh it, just I'm, I flip a switch and then I'll just completely be Over those behaviors like no, there's, there's beauty in the work. You got to fall in love with the work. You got to fall in love with the fact that you'll catch yourself feeling I gotta turn this shit up, I'm not gonna look at my phone, I'm not gonna look at this fucking text message. I got like I've, I've gotten to a place where I used to feel guilty because, like, once you become a leader in an organization, you put on that role and you're like, okay, I'm gonna, I'm gonna always be chief. So somebody reaches out to me. I got always pick up the phone, no, I don't.
Speaker 1:And it hit me hard when I realized like there's like my wife is Downstairs right next to me and I'm trying to solve somebody else's fucking problem. Like no apps, I'm fucking literally not. No, because I would tell them hey, prioritize your family. So why am I not prioritizing? Mind, fuck that. You can fucking wait. Wait, it's not emergency. If it's emergency, you call Alex, call 911.
Speaker 1:He'll get you, not me right now like my wife has to become, has to be a priority.
Speaker 1:Exactly through so fucking much to support us. They're the ones are fucking there. We tend to think that it's make our friends, our teammates. They're amazing, they're wonderful, they're gonna be great dudes that we're gonna always rely on. But who's the one at the hospital when you're hurt? Who's the one that's gonna pick you up when you fall down, when you have issues, fucking wife, your kids, the family that you live with at home? You gotta prioritize them. And after a career, even if it's a short career in the military, they've dealt with a lot of shit and we owe it to them. And it always blows my mind when guys don't realize, and Especially when they realize it too late, but like, oh fuck, she picked up the kids they left. Like, yeah, of course you don't prioritize your fucking family.
Speaker 2:You got to put them first and you know it's like you talked about, like well, I'm a leader, now I'm in charge of these guys. It's not we forget that, like our family, like that's your main team, that's who you're a real team leader for your wife and kids. You know what I mean. So that's the team. You, you are a team leader. Yeah, you know you're a cultivating success out of your team. You're getting personal investment out of your team into your vision for your family and where it's going. You know, yeah, but if we don't actively cultivate that because we're busy Building the work teams, then our home team is gonna suffer.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think one of the other things that guys in I'm glad you mentioned that story about your friend a lot of guys that Finally transition at next chapter in life, they're building back that relationship with their kids at a deficit. How would you Revitalize your relationship with your little ones? What are some things that you did to kind of be that full-time Role model, dad, now that you're able to be there a hundred percent?
Speaker 2:It's mostly just being, I mean, it's just the time it's being home. You know, like this is not Me and my wife we were adding it up my oldest kid for the first, you know, seven years of his life. I really only spent three years with them, so and then that's how you don't realize it at the time because of what you're doing and all that, so it's just time. You know. What I mean is I'm like alright, well, they deserve my time and that's that's the biggest thing is ensuring that Give them time and that their hobbies, whether like sort of so my oldest son, my two oldest, they love fishing. To me I'm like do this is like watching paint dry.
Speaker 1:Like, I'm like holy shit.
Speaker 2:But if my oldest, if they're my sons, are telling me, like, look at this lure, I got to listen and I got to learn about this lure, or I got, I may hate it, you know what I mean. It's, it's finding like I Still have to place an emphasis on their hobbies. Yeah, to let them know that their hobbies are important, you know, and thank God also, some of their hobbies are baseball. That I can do. So I'm like hell, yeah, we're good, you know, but like.
Speaker 2:But the perfect example is the fishing, and my wife knows I can't stand fishing and I'll text her the whole time this miserable, this miserable with my kids, like, look at this. Then it's like, fully invested, my eyes are looking at what he's talking about. You know what I mean ask and invest it in what he's talking about. Or I'll ask him a question about like, hey, if I, so that he feels like he's helping me. You know, but you, it's definitely the just time right, like having time and using the time.
Speaker 2:I don't know how much time we have left Every. You know something could happen tomorrow to you or whatever. So why, I don't want to feel like I wasted that time and there are definitely moments I tell my wife they're like, oh, like you know, laying in bed or something, I'll be like I should have done this differently. I should have done that. And you know, when we talk about how that is, that's a growth. Part of being a parent also, you know, is be like I need to do I wish I did this better. I can do that better Is you're still growing as well. A lot of people we forget as dads, like we've only been a dad as long as our kid has been alive, like we're still growing as well the whole time. You know, I mean, there's no, I don't care how many pamphlets or books you read on what to expect and being a dad and being a parent till you do it. You're really learning as you go the whole time.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I know 90% of the reason why I ask other dads about their perspectives Cause I'm just, I'm just piling up all the do's and don't do for when I do have kids. It's like yeah, right.
Speaker 2:But then the thing is you'll be like well, I got all these do's and don'ts, but then it's gonna be completely different because your own path and your own journey is gonna be so much different.
Speaker 2:And the way you do it, like you know, the way I'd be like, well, I'm never gonna do this. And now I'm like, oh man, I can always do that. Or you know, you don't know, because it's like each, every time a new situation appears, that's, and that's the first situation your kid has of that, that's the first situation you have as a parent of that. So it's still. You know, it's just like being a team leader. You know your family is your team, your team. You know your private, your kids, your privates, your saw gunners, whatever you wanna call them. They're gonna go through trials and tribulations. Your job as the team leader is just to put them in the best position to be successful and happy. So, and that's it.
Speaker 2:So how do I, as a dad, I just ask myself and what do I do to ensure that my kids are gonna be in the best position to be successful and happy? You know they're not always gonna win, and I'm fine with that. That's good for them, you know. But I just make sure I teach them that you're not always gonna win. It's not always about the winning, it's about did you give everything you have? Are you trying and are you satisfied with your effort? And if the answer is yes, then be proud of yourself. You know and that's something that we don't sometimes in the Reservoir of the Army value the effort. It's like I don't give a shit how good you tried, or if you did 110%, you guys still fucking failed.
Speaker 1:It's like you know, and now? So that's another thing.
Speaker 2:I have to separate is sometimes it's not just the pass or fail. You know it's not a being a dad is not a go or no go you know what I mean. You are a no go at this station there is no one telling you like all right, you're a no go at this station. It is a learn as you go, process and you 100% effort, you know, teach your kids.
Speaker 2:You know I teach my boys. If you long as you give 110% effort and don't quit, I'll be proud of you. I don't care if you win or lose at the end of the day. But if you can look me in the eye and say I did everything I could, I had everything I had, we're good dude. I'm proud of you. That's it, no matter what it is, you know.
Speaker 1:And lastly, before I let you off, yeah, but what are your top 10 pieces of advice that you would give any service member as they're transitioning in relations to employment, life, or any other advice that you would have?
Speaker 2:So for anyone getting out, I would tell them the biggest thing, honestly, is have a plan. And that doesn't mean have a job lined up, it doesn't. It just means have a plan, whether that's hey, I'm gonna go move back home for three months while I do X, y and Z, and then at that point I have this lined up and that line, whatever it is. You need to have a plan because so many guys and girls get out without a strict plan in place and they end up floating aimlessly and the next thing you know, it's been 18 months and they don't have a purpose anymore because they're missing. You're missing the camaraderie, you're missing the brotherhood, you're missing being a part of something where, like you were valued, like you had purpose. You know what I mean. And if you don't have an active plan, you just kind of float off into the ether and all of a sudden you wake up one day and you'd like what am I doing with my life? I'm not doing anything, I don't know what. And then it's almost like you've gone so far. You don't know what to do because you've been out for so long. Have a plan. You don't need a job lined up, you don't need a six figure this lined up. You don't need any of that lined up. You just need to have an active plan for the first six to eight months to make sure that you stay squared away. Have a routine. A routine is huge. So many guys you get out structure and routine is huge in the military right. Like you do the same thing every single day and that's. It lends to a structure that you feel comfortable in. Have a structure. Wake up at the same time every day, go to the gym at the same time, whatever it is you're doing. Have a plan. Have a daily winning routine to fall back on so that when shit does go or it does go awry, hey, I can just jump back onto my routine. I know it'll ground myself and I can keep going. Stay in contact with the people you're in with. I don't care if they're still in or they're out, it don't matter those friendships that you made, especially with the people you deployed with. Like the guys that I went on target with, I was privates with. We grew up through the ranks together. You know what I mean. I still talk to those guys and I met them in 2011. And we still active and most of them are all out. One's a firefighter in New York, one lives in San Diego, doesn't matter. Still talk to them. You know what I mean. So stay in contact with those people because they know they went through the same thing. They got out. Maybe they got out before you. Hey, what did you do when this happened? You know what I mean.
Speaker 2:Don't be afraid to ask questions of people who got out, people who are still in. Ask anyone. You know what I mean. A lot of times it's like we're afraid because of we're taught to figure it out. Fucking tough it out, figure it out. You'll be all right. If you don't know the answer to something, just ask a question, and it doesn't matter who you ask the question to. You get to ask your dad, your mom, your cousin, anyone that you think might have insight on a situation. Just ask them. You know what I mean. Like I can't tell you how many times in the civilian world I've gotten ahead because I just was like he might know better about this than I am. I'm just gonna ask and people and you know that's the thing about the civilian world to the military is no one in the civilian world is like what are you a fucking idiot?
Speaker 1:You know what I mean. They're like. How do you not know that you don't?
Speaker 2:know how to figure that out.
Speaker 2:Go, what are you talking about? You know what I mean. In the civilian world, you ask like, hey, I'm having trouble with this. What would you do? What recommend for this? People don't they'll tell you, right, you know? Like, find professional people. They'll tell you they don't mind sharing with you. And finally, I would say, have a greater purpose, right? So you're gonna lose that purpose in the military, your value of who you are, your identity or, so to speak. You're gonna have to rediscover your identity all over again. You know what I mean. And.
Speaker 2:But you need to have a greater purpose for your life than just what's in front of you. Like, what is your long term? Like, what is your real? What do you want out of your life and your existence? As you're going through this human experience, what do you want out of it? Do you want okay, I want, you know I want money. It's like well, why do you want money? Do you want the freedom from it? Do you want no debt from? Like? You need to find a deeper purpose. You know I want wealth and abundance. In what way? You know you may already have it. Rediscover what it is.
Speaker 2:It's just a big thing is you need a deep sense of purpose and identity and you really have to dig deep to find out what that identity is gonna be, cause you have to like it's like a chameleon or, you know, a lizard shedding its skin, like you're gonna have to shed some skin to really rebuild your identity and who you're gonna be for the rest of your life. You know I'll always be an Army Ranger, forever. You know what I mean. That's always gonna be a part of my life, but at the same time, that's not gonna be the only identifying factor for the rest of my life. I'm gonna be so much more than that. I'm gonna take all the lessons I learned from being in the Ranger Regiment and apply it to being a man and just, you know, a father, a husband, a member of a leader in society. How do I contribute to my society? Whether it's, you know, minimal, maximal, local, global, it doesn't matter. You know what I mean. And so that value, that identity, just like no, you're gonna have to shed it and find a new one.
Speaker 2:And that's one of, but that's one of the most beautiful things about when you do get out is you have so much experience and so much like you've been through so much, especially in your. You go through special operate. You go through selection process or you know, ranger school. You go through hard schools. You go through tough shit over and over and over again. You know you can do hard things. When things get tough you can just put your head down and go and you're gonna be okay and take that with you. When shit gets tough in the civilian world you're gonna be okay, I promise you. As long as you just keep going, you're okay. You know a setback I tell guys because I help coach guys now and like fitness, mindset discipline, things like that is that a setback only sets you back if you let it. At the end of the day, everyone's gonna get setbacks. It's up to you whether it's a speed bump or a brick wall. How you approach it is gonna basically determine how you're gonna if you're gonna get stuck or keep moving.
Speaker 1:Absolutely right, and it's. People don't understand how valuable that mindset is and we got it through blood, sweat and tears in our soft background. Our job in the military helped us cultivate that and that makes us extremely, extremely high employable. It makes us sought after individuals like coaching and being able to give back to people through mentorship. That's something that we can train others. We just have to be willing to continue developing that once we get out, because we can lose that. It's really easy.
Speaker 2:It never stops, you know. You never stop being a student, always learning. You know what I mean. I guarantee you there's someone out there who knows more than you. That's it. That's what I tell myself. It's like oh, I'm feeling pretty good about this, or I know a lot about this. I guarantee you, someone out there knows more than me.
Speaker 1:You know or I?
Speaker 2:tell other guys like, hey, this is tough or I'm struggling, I don't. You know if you find that identity and that purpose, this is what I want out of life. It's daunting, it's tough. I'm like, dude, if you want it, there are people already living it who are less talented than you. The people are already living your dream, your dream life, with much less talent than you, because they just didn't take no for an answer and they use discipline and tenacity and just kept going and going and going. You know, so you, like you can have the dream life. Whatever your dream life is, it's possible. You can live it as soon as you want, as long as you start picturing your dream self or your ideal, who you are, and then all the decisions you make on a daily basis make them as that person. Would that person say yes or no to this? That's how I'm gonna. That's what I'm gonna do.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and it's about focusing on the day to day that you, the day to day achievements you have to put in and do, rather than just focus on that big goal. Like, you can want to lose weight and be fit and just fantasize about how great you'll look, but if you're not doing the work every single fucking day, you're never going to get there. Right, exactly, you know like it's.
Speaker 2:The whole thing is to tell you you know, have the. It's just like in the middle. So you have your five meter target, your 25 meter, your 100 meter, right, your 100 meter target. That's our final goal. That's where I want to get, but I'm not gonna get there unless I take out the five meter target first. Yeah, you know, and that's that over time those five meters add up and all of a sudden you're at 50, 70, 80, 90, and then you're at your 100. And then you form a new 5, 25, and 100,. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1:Yeah, man, Dude. Alex, thank you so much for being here today.
Speaker 2:Thank you, I appreciate the time brother.
Speaker 1:Absolutely dude. Do you have a website we can plug and put out there?
Speaker 2:So everything I do I do through Instagram. My handle's a, you know, alex Aguilar, underscore TRM, the revive man. That is my company. I started my coaching program for fitness, mindset, nutrition, also for public speaking, writing, all that stuff. But I do everything through Instagram. You hit the links on my Instagram page. It has applications for coaching, it has my one-off special operations, selection prep, fitness program, ebooks, all that stuff. It's all located right inside of that link.
Speaker 1:Hell yeah, we'll put that into the episode description. So just scroll on down, click on it and connect with Alex and get on your way to being a better, more motivated individual. Alex again, thank you so much, bro. Anytime you wanna come on and talk, I'm gonna be releasing this under our team room chats series just unfiltered, unscripted, just fucking soft professionals telling it to you straight. Thank you so much for being here.
Speaker 2:I hope you enjoyed it. Thank you for having me, bro. I did thank you.
Speaker 1:We'll see you next time, everybody.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, I appreciate it, brother, take it easy, we'll see you. Thanks, bro.
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